I posted here awhile ago, left for a bit partially because i never made any meaningful connections but mostly because I had forced myself to be happy, my brother is now also suicidal and i care more about him getting better than me having genuine emotions.
The important thing is i’ve come to a conclusion. There is no point in living. We convince ourselves that there is, that we’ll be happy or that we’re doing it for someone else, but that’s not true. Everyone we love will die. Everything that makes us so fleetingly happy will pass. Only emptiness stays, all other emotions are momentary and useless. I would rather die than have to deal with this joke. I’ve given up on the things that i’ve seen other people post about on here, i know i’ll never have a relationship, i know i’m stupid, i know that the one  thing that i thought was important is not and that i am a complete moron for thinking it was. None of that matters. All that matters is that if i keep living, i will have to watch everyone i have ever cared about die. it’s not worth it.
6 comments
i agree completely. i wish i had comforting words and positive thoughts to give to you. i don’t because you’re right. nothing matters in this world. we are kidding ourselves if we think otherwise.
thank you. i wish i’d never realized this… there’s just no hope.
You’re supposed to find joy in the little things. Help other people find joy in small moments. Those moments make life tolerable.
how long does the joy last, in the grand scheme of things? joy is the most brief of all emotions and once you’ve been happy in one moment you can never ever get that moment back. people are dead forever.
Silly Squirrel, you whole life is but a moment.
Everything you do, say, see, feel, and touch, happens in this one tiny moment.
Stop hurting for yesterday,
Stop worrying about tomorrow.
Find true peace in the only way possible;
Be here now
Squrrelfriend; life is about your thoughts, because your thoughts turn into things. IF you keep thinking this is what life is; meaningless, hopelessness, etc. then that is all you will get out if it. Instead of focusing on how everyone will die, start enjoying the NOW. Because that is all we get in life; lots of boring shit and a few interesting moments.
You still have twenty or more years left on this earth. Think about that. Twenty years to change who you are from today. Never say never or it will never happen. Set goals, find things you like doing and pursue them; and eventually you will find something that DOES make living worth while, that restores your hope in waking up the next day.
How could humanity have survived so long if not for Hope? We hope that we can have a good life, that we can make something of ourselves, or impress friends, or live up to our parents expectations. But what you should have hope in is that someday you will reach a place where you can be happy; where you can find joy.
Don’t mistake me for a optimist. Life really does suck. WE live for 70 short years then die. But it’s those special moments that I’m always seeking that make it all worth while.