I don’t have the right to die as quickly and painlessly as I hope. I cannot will myself to change. I have the same thoughts each day. I am so selfish. All I want is to escape from all of this. I haven’t talked for months. But here I am now. Here I am. And I hope I make it to the other side tomorrow.  I just can’t take it here anymore.

Please pray that I get to finish it this time. Please. I am beyond repair.