I have the most beautiful girlfriend in the whole wide universe. The best friends anyone could wish for, and yet i feel so alone.
I just feel as if no one actually understands me or knows what I feel. And i used to be a cutter. Yes, used to. I have been bullied a lot at primary school and not just words, but I got beat up every single day. And I was just a little girl, too afraid to do anything. As i grew older I started to change and I kinda built a wall around myself, a wall I kept for years but is now starting to fall into pieces. The reason? My girlfriend. She does things that nobody else can do, she makes me feel loved and I started to get more and more emotional, I started to feel again. But I gotta say i’m different. I like things others don’t and i’m just plain weird, but that’s me and I like who i am. But because of the bullying i got affected very bad and it still hurts everyday. I must say that I kinda ignore the haters now, but deep inside it does hurt me alot and my girl knows. I talk alot with my bestfriends and they know everything about be, just not the fact that i kinda felt and feel suicidal. I just don’t know what to do. Goddamn i gotta go downstairs, I guess i’ll talk to anyone who’ll listen later.
1 comment
We build these walls to protect ourselves from pain.
Unfortunatly the walls keep the bad stuff in and the good stuff out.
When we become intimate with someone we often let down our guard and lower our walls.
This creates risk, now anyone can hurt us.
The key is balance and boundaries.
Find balance with the height of your wall, create boundaries, let some in, but not all.
Remember, to love, is to risk.