So I lived in a foster home for all of my life…I remember the day when I was sent there with my brothers and sister…I was scared…I thought my mother gave me away…
Things were never good after that…There were children in the homes with me…Some times they would make me do things with them…I to be honest cant tell if it was rape or not…because they were not much older then me…maybe they we nine and I was like six or seven…But Kids shouldnt know about that stuff…
Anyways…
My mother was a horrible one…she didn’t call for over a year…Maybe it was to hard for her…I was in a foster home with my siblings but as we got older we started to get separated until I was with my youngest brother who was barley a year older then me…yeah I was the youngest…and we landed this one foster home which we ended up living a long time…but him and the foster mom used to fight a lot and they would pick on us and because I was the girl I got it worse because the dad favored me so the wife hated me, the sons hated me cuzz i was a girl…it was hard trying to figure out who had it worse….me or my brother…I remember though when they picked on him and take his food away I would secretly give him mine…We had a lot of issues though…because of our last foster home was horrible…they did many mean and hurtful things to me and my brother…we used to get beat bye the parents and there children…and one time for Christmas my brother wanted this special toy and he got it but the foster family made a mistake and took it away and gave it to there birth child…my brother was crashed…and so was I…I took care of him…I tried…
But then he got rebellious and stole…from me and every one who had something worth stealing…I didnt know for the longest time…** He eventually got him self kicked out…
So I was left alone in that hell hole…certain things got a lot better…the oldest son moved away…and the youngest son didn’t hate me anymore…we even called each other brother and sister…but unfortunately he liked me to much …He never touched me..He just….
Anyways…
They used to say mean things that made me feel ugly…and fat…and rotten…I started cutting my self with n earing…as painful as that sounds…well it was painful but i was afraid of sharp things…
But I stoped…but for the longest time I slept with a knife under my pillow…It made me feel comfortable…
Then I met her…she was going threw the same kind of misery as I was…I felt instantly close…we were the best of friends…I didn’t feel so alone…then One day while I was in Spanish….she was in the bathroom above me cutting her wrists…She survived….and thats when I seen all of these cuts on her arm…there were so many…
I thought she was so selfish when I found out…I was upset and Mad…How could she leave me…How could she do that before me…
She had one person at least who cared…a father..
I had no one…not even a brother…
A month later we started going out…I wanted to be close to this pain…
But this is not really interesting and know body really cares…I just like talking out loud
Oh but my brother…he moved far away as a bum…havent talked to him in a few years because he loves that rotten foster family that screwed him…I dont matter
1 comment
For the longest time I too felt neglected and betrayed by those who fed me and even though they may have felt love for me, I could not see it. My method of dealing with this was taking pills, any type of pills I could find, and it relieved me of some pain. This is a story worth listening too because I share a similar life with you. Please don’t ever stop believing in hope because it got me through those tough times. You will always have a friend in me who is willing to listen and even go as far as stretching forth my hand in need if need be. Just don’t give up just yet because I believe you…
Anthony T. Kimble
http://www.anthonykimble.com