Its been almost 2 days since me and him said our final goodbyes.. I’m feeling better, but it still hurts. I miss him so much and I try to focus on the good times but they just end up making me sad. I know that I shouldn’t do it but I keep checking his Facebook everyday. Mostly just to see his face, but since I know that he is talking to someone else maybe I also just unconsciously check to see if the relationship status changes .. He said if they went out, he wouldn’t even ask for at least a month, but I can’t help but look anyways.. Today I looked and she wrote on his page “You’re the best” .. I don’t know why.. I feel like its meant for me to see somehow, like who just puts that. I mean he barely ever goes on Facebook and she probably texts him all the time, so why put that on his wall?.. and then her best friend posted “Ahhhhhh!!! So cute!!!” seriously a minute after she posted it.. which didn’t make it look any less obvious.. Like how unsubtle can you be? She knows that these two are being set up to get over me. I just feel like if it is for me its really cruel… When I read it I felt a wave wash over me, like being punched off your feet, and now I shake as I type this.. I know I’m only hurting myself, but I hurt anyway. I want to say something, I want to run to him, I want to urge him to try again.. But I know I can’t, I know its not right. I just can’t live with him being with someone else because I know that no one wants me..
1 comment
Well you’re right about that, you are only hurting yourself. Looking at Facebook after a breakup is a great way to torture yourself. Let me tell you from experience, when someone says something nice like “if I date someone else I would still wait for a month” and stuff like that, some day you are going to see something that proves they were lying and it is going to hurt like hell. If he is ready to move on, I doubt he will wait a full month just to honor something he said to his ex. When he wants to say he’s in a relationship with that girl, he will.
Try not to think that they are posting things purposely for you to see it. I know what you meant. But there is also a chance that they are not. They are just talking to each other. You don’t know if they think you will see it or not. Even if they are doing it on purpose, they only succeed at annoying you if you actually look at it, and so far you have been. So you can win this little game by deciding not to look.
I hope you will choose to stop looking rather than wait for something really bad to happen. I had to learn the hard way. Let me tell you, seeing the person you love not only say they are “in a relationship” but “engaged” on Facebook to the person they just start dating will send you into a nervous breakdown. My ex told me the same things, that she didn’t want a relationship after me and she just needed to focus on herself and get back to school. People say these things to try to make us feel better. If you keep snooping around, you will find out it was a lie just like I did.
I got dumped almost a full year ago and I stopped looking at her Facebook a long time ago. I actually deleted mine. But a few days recently I have felt the urge to look again, just to see how she looks or see if she is with the same person. But I realize it is pointless. Even if it says she is single, I still haven’t heard from her, so it doesn’t mean she misses me or even remembers me. And if she is still with the other person, it will just hurt like hell and make me wonder if they really are going to get married.
I tell myself the same stuff you do, I’m already hurting, I’m already miserable, I might as well get it over and look. But no, I have to try not to. I might be hurting and sad now, but looking WILL make it a million times worse.
I hope you try to stop soon. It can really backfire big time if you keep trying to see what an ex is up to on Facebook. It will be much healthier for moving on if you stop.