I live in isolation 24.7 for years and years and years. I made a post on here last year about my life and it is exactly the same.  Try having nobody to talk to every morning day and night, day after day after month after year. I have been through so called therapy and it was fucking pathetic bullshit, ive been in mental hospital twice and it made me worse because there was zero care and it was all fucking screwed up and pathetic. I am done now I cannot take anymore. I cant even find a job and so have nothing to leave the house for everyday. Its a cycle of deep depression and intense anger. I live with parents but they are completely missing the point still wondering what is wrong eve n though I have told them countless times, and they are the most negative fucking people you could meet. I cant even be bothered to write my suicide note because Im too fucking angry right now. I have nothing to live for and so I am already decided on my decision because there is nothing I can do to better my life.
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
5 comments
Jungle, there is always something to better your life you just have to find what it is. But I do understand where your coming from. I also suffer from major depression for months at a time where I can’t even get outta bed to take a shower. Have you ever been on medication ? My meds are finally starting to take effect and I can see the light at the end if the tunnel for the first time in a very long time. It is saving my life and it can save yours. Don’t give up until you have tried all of your options. Your good at something, you just have to figure out what that is. This is a great site for support. We’re here for you when you need someone to talk to. Be hopeful.
It’s so honest of you to express your feelings the way you have. You’re totally allowed to feel that way. I know the feeling of making a decision to end it all. Recently, I said to myself : “You’ve bitched all these years about wanting to die, you may as well just make it happen! But not now. Wait until 2013. Just go about your life until then and just suddenly do it without any drama.” There have been lighter moments in between those feelings and decisions, but I never feel certain I will get over the desire once and for all.
I don’t feel I have the right to sway you from your decision because I’m not in your shoes to really know how it is for you. But I’d like you to know that you’re not alone in your feelings, and I don’t think badly of you for having them. I wish you well.
Hello Jungle,
Speechless…your anger is overwhelming. Who are you angry at? Really?
What have you done since February…to get out of the house…meet new people…join a club, support group…try another type of therapy? Just wondering.
I know giving up is easier at first…but you have to change in order for your reality to change. No one else can really help you…unless you want help. But the anger has probably been the reason you have not felt helped yet or been able to get help. So the first step is to try to get past your anger…it is counter-productive…that is all. I am not saying you don’t have the right to be angry…just that it isn’t good for you.
Sorry you haven’t had a better year…but then it hasn’t actually been a year yet has it? So why not take the next two months and instead of focusing on your anger and planning your exit…why not try to do something positive for yourself….have another kick at the cat?
Peace
Amakua
This. ^
Amakua has the right of it with the anger.
Hey Jungle420, I just wanted to let you know I very strongly identify with your plight. I know how badly it sucks, for me, I feel like it is slowly killing me daily, it hurts and it is sad. I hope you find a way to change and improve your circumstance as I am struggling daily to find a way to change and improve mine. Good luck to you, Jungle420.