My dad recently started posting online somewhere about how my mum is a bad mother. Tonight he says he did a survey online to find out what others think. They voted in his favour. And that’s all he needs to feel he is justified. So tell me, would a good FATHER abuse his family? Make his family literally shake in fear like I am now? Break things, and physically hurt people? Shout and abuse people until they break? Deny his son of any choice in his life whatsoever? Make his son feel like he has to commit suicide to escape the pain of life? Shut himself off from family all day unless he was going to abuse one of them? Justify his anger with violence? Be paranoid that everyone’s out to get him? Be paranoid to a level he can’t believe a word anyone says from the family? Shut himself off from all his relatives? Not let anyone tell him the truth about how things are?
He’s a sick person. He is meant to love me, not hate me. My mum said ‘we all love you, you know’, yeah right. So that’s why you abuse me and monitor me every second of every day to see what I’m doing and whether it’s up to your satisfaction. I have to play the victim and let them win. I have to suffer. If I don’t, I end up suffering more. I can’t fight back. When I do, things get worse.
5 comments
Wow, it sounds like you live in a really difficult situation. I guess you have to tough it out until you can save up enough money to move out. Either that, or buy a gun and shoot the old man and make it look like a suicide?
How old are you? Have you tried reporting the abuse to someone at your school?
Or tell someone with legal authority, they should be able to do something. I never did, which may be why I spend every waking moment wanting to murder my mom’s ex husband (the abusive sack of shit that made sure my childhood was one that would ruin anyone) if it isn’t stopped, it will eat away at you forever. Seriously, take it from someone that didn’t, call the cops, tell them what happens when he gets pissed off.
@Dave_N it’s going to take a long time for me to have any significant amount of money, just what he wants. I have a little stashed away, but that’s in case I run away. I’m not going to go around shooting anyone though.
@floridamike I would risk making things a LOT worse if I told someone at school, trust me. I can’t explain it all in this comment, but that could make everyone in my house very unhappy with me because it would cause a lot of problems.
@trappedinthought I want to do that. I don’t know, I risk making things a lot worse. If I was going to run away I’d do it beforehand. I’m just kind of stuck in a situation where I have to put up with it for another few years until something can change. But in my mind, I never want to see them again after I leave this house.
Well, if your journey through life ever takes you through Northern California (assuming I’m alive and still here) you’ll be welcome here. I’ve actually decided that if I ever find the girl that wants to make the mistake of putting up with me, I won’t tell anyone in my family (except maybe one of my sisters, the one that can keep her mouth shut) and the same thing goes for if I ever have kids. It’s not enough (for me) to just have no contact with them, I don’t want them to ever have any knowledge of anything involving myself or any people I care about…wow, parents really can fuck a kid up…anyway, just make sure that you remember that option, even if you don’t think you’ll use it.