I am a 55 year old woman who has a doctorate degree and an high level position but in the past 8 months I have lost my husband to cancer, my home to forclosure after all the bills and lack of income, bankrupted my husbands estate, had 1 major and 2 minor auto accidents. My only child will not much to do with me because I remind him of the loss of his father.  I can’t sleep but 2 – 3 hours a night. All I do is work. I can’t take much more stress in my life.  My psychologist says the symptoms I’m showing are called “disassociation” All I want is peace and to be with my husband……
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I’m sorry to hear about your situation. It sounds extremely distressing. Do you think time will help heal your wounds or do you feel your situation is hopeless?
I keep clinging to what it would do to my son to lose me right after his father. That is what has kept me safe.
You need to start over and as quickly as you can. You need to realize that your budget is not what it used to be and may never be again and start living within your own personal means.
If you have a doctorate and a high level position, then you are still much much better off than most people out there monetarily, but you need to make your lifestyle fit your budget very quickly. To do this you have to radically evaluate exactly what you need and take everything into consideration. You need a much more affordable home, cut out things like spa or beauty treatments, sell stuff, cheaper psychologist, everything.
You might want to consider some volunteer work to take your mind off your problems and put your thoughts towards helping others. It really can make a difference. Once you are financially able to, perhaps a nice vacation with you and your child only can help repair your distance.
I do realize how lucky I am to have my degree and my job. I auctioned off everything I didn’t need back in October. I was shocked at the prices I received for my possessions. I have signed up to work with Big Brothers, Big Sisters. I can’t afford mentally to change psychologists or psychiatrist. Their too good for me, they get me. I’ve been put on a new medication that seems to help me cope better, only thing is, I feel like I’m turning into my mentally ill mother…….
When I say this I’m being totally serious:
You need sleep and a break(if you can get it)..
life is too fast and your brain needs rest to manage it all..
at least do something relaxing, alone.. time for you..
and drop it all for just a bit.. to relax or sleep..
I hope you can..
Thank you, I have done just that. I resigned from my management job and stepped down to just an adverage worker. I’m on new medication that has kicked my butt as far as sleep goes. I’m more clear headed now. Most the suicidule thoughts are gone. I was really on the edge.
hey, glad to hear you’re doing better!! 🙂