I have overwhelming desires to stab myself in the gut with a dagger. I have even done this a few times in an exhibitionist way on video. I’ve allowed as much as 1.25 inches of the blade to go inside my gut with a kind of a safety wrapped around the blade, but I want to go deeper. I don’t know where this came from, but I need to do it. The pain is minimal as it only penetrates the skin, small layer of fat and into the muscle a little bit. It bleeds and I feel a kind of sexual release doing it. I absolutely love it and have done it three times. I want to expose 1.5 inches next and still feel this will be safe.
I love the ritual of hara kiri and would ideally like to end it all that way at some point.
Does anyone else crave this?
Help please.
5 comments
As a suicidal veteran myself I can honestly say that No one should desire this…
Please contact http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ OR notify 911(USA) 999 (UK) that you are planning on harming yourself. Being damaged to death is the opposite of living, homoixtab…
May you find the happiness you truly need.
Yes. I have done the same. I also have frequent “impulses” to do a quick and powerful stabbing of my left hand (I am right handed).
I crave death….but not by hara kiri ….seems painful and would bring extreme suffering before dying…..not something I want to experience in my last moments.
I have stabbed myself three times, one time with a 1 and 1/4 inch blade and twice with a 3/4 inch blade exposed. I loved it and just want to go deeper. I could really let someone else do it though and not care how deep they went.
I’m going to go deeper the next time. I want to feel the pain of the blade going into my muscle, but not through to the intestines.
yes I have stabbed myself once some time I want to go want to go deeper to see if it well kill me