I need to go, before I hurt someone. I’m tired of screwing up, the thoughts are back in full force. A tiny voice telling me that leaving now is my best choice. Why can’t it shut up? Why can’t anyone realize what I’ve done to myself before? Why can’t they see the scars, or hear me at night? Why can’t anyone grab a bottle of glue and at least try to put me together, make me human?
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a tiny voice?
I pray every night for this…I to feel broken, scarred, depressed, and that I’m not good enough for anyone. I jus want the pain to stop. That’s all. Find someway through this.
I know its hard, like a war, they wont shut up, they are trying to tare you down.. The voices cant stay there forever. The human world, its a messed up place, we would all escape if we could, but we can’t and we won’t.
But along with all this, words can be sharper than blades and if you don’t blunt those blades there going to hurt more, I know you dont want that and tell your voices they dont need anymore hurt than you do now. Dont runaway though, because you will end up in the same spot, so if you blunt it, it wont hurt you.
REMEMBER your not alone; you can talk to me about anything, you would want to if you knew what I have been through.
Zebragirl – you shouldn’t have deleted your post
I felt even worse after posting it, it just wasn’t worth it.
I can see your comments in moderation. I only got to read the first few paragraphs before you deleted it. You shouldn’t feel bad about the negative comments. It’s not their life so they don’t care.
Well no, everyone has their opinions. I am what I am. I mean I am proud to have survived this long, but I can only take so much. I guess I was looking for what I don’t have at home… the problem was it took me a few tries to do. I finally feel like there is someone I feel something for that I never have before. I deleted the post bc I was embarrassed. And for some reason I am almost in tears bc of that and my depression. I feel exhausted, embarrassed and done.
@zebragirl:
all i can say about that, is that you’re treading in dangerous, potentially destructive territory. If what you have at home isn’t what you want, perhaps you should address that issue, prior to finding someone else… because you are risking hurting lots of people this way, and people get mean when they get hurt, and mean people might make your life very difficult in retaliation for whatever wrongs they perceive having been done to them.
Maybe you’ve already gotten caught up in a complicated situation… and if so, you should probably attempt to slow or halt everything, and get to the bottom of it all, before taking any further action. Stop and think. And keep thinking, until you figure it out.
why is that the comments are about zebra girl?i wish you the best kallilan.you will find someone who will understand you one day.but until then keep breathing.i don’t think suicide is something you should think about.wish you the best.
i read your first post and if it is your parents that are the problem.tell them to fuck off.and your sister,i don’t know slap her,or call her slut or something.my family is just like that the humiulate me.even my mom.but after i give them a shit and give a good punch to some slut in home.now nobody dares to say some thing to me.some times you have to be an asshole you know.