What do I say? There are no words to describe what I’m feeling right now…. what’s the closest I can come to putting it into words? IDK…
Sorrow, hopeless, dead, despondant, pointless….pain.
Yet at the same time… there’s , this nothingness, this resignation that its time…
I don’t want to text Matt, poor guy has crazy hours as it is… ahhh, the life of a shrink! Not to mention I’ve just gotten to where I’ve pretty much given up… must be frustrating knowing I’m coming in, yet he doesn’t get mad at me… on his phone a little too much maybe but not mad, … I just don’t want to alienate him, which I guess is why I hold things back a lot of times. They are so much worse than what I’ve told him… but I’m really fed up and sick of myself, I’m sure he must be too.
I want him to be proud of me… not sick to death of me!
I know I’m sick to death of me… and I just want out.
9 comments
I really want out too! My doctor keeps asking me if i’d like to talk to someone like a therapist cause she thinks i should but im really not interested in talking to some stranger about my problems who doesnt give a shit and gets paid way to much money
@ crying… are you the one who’s the doctors son?
Not all shrinks are jerks, some really do care… and not all are overpaid.
Matt, my shrink is really nice it’s just there’s only so much he can do and I feel like there’s nothing I CAN DO TO CHANGE THINGS.
He’s become a really good friend and it’s more the friendship and support that keeps me going back than the belief that I’m going to get better.
I already know it’s just a matter of time before I die.
Want really bad to end it now!
No i think your thinking of someone else and im female lol!
I just cant be bothered with therapy i guess i dont really want help i just want out thats it
@ crying… hmmm, ok maybe it was smiling on the inside. you guys mentioned the resemblance with the user id now Im getting you confused.
Are you the Aussie that was there for our marathon last night… back and forth between the 2 posts? Your little sister kept coming in the room?
I wish you could meet Matt…hell, I wish everyone on here could meet Matt! He’s not some stuck up shrink that can’t be bothered although the cell phone thing is pretty annoying.
Hey yeah that would be pretty easy to get us confused our usernames sound pretty similar. Yeah i came on a bit yesterday and spoke a bit to you’s yeah that was me but yeah my older sis was over with her son and they kept comming in my room. Your shrink sounds nice it’d be hard to find a therapist that you actually like and wana talk to so im glad you like yours and yeah the phone thing would be very annoying i hate when like my sister or mum does that when im trying to talk to them so if it was my therapist that would be even worse thats actually quite rude
@ crying… yeah, it’s annoying with anyone but when the only reason why they’re talking to you is because you’re paying them….?
I had mentioned it to him just before he went on vacation last month and he said ” oh, I didn’t know it bothered you,all you had to do was say something.” But he’s back at it again… there’s more in the two marathon posts we had last night. There were 2 going at the same time…. with the same people… it was really pretty funny and soooo much fun!
Wish you had been able to be on here more. We would’ve loved to have had you.
With the cell phone and the shrink… it’s gotten to where I’m considering quitting. The thing is though if I do I know I won’t make it long without his friendship and support. Got to ask myself though how much of a friendship it really is… I mean you don’t pay your friends to talk to you. Yeah, I get that that’s his job and how he pays his bills… but you would think then that if he really were my “friend” that he could stay off that damn phone for the 45 min that I’m in there and paying him for!
Especially since I’ve already mentioned it , and I was extremely upset about it by the time I got up the nerve to say anything.
UGH! It just frustrates me!
If its helping you then i guess keep goin and maybe just keeping bringing up the phone thing till he stops doin it which hopefully he will god that would annoy me! I’d probably get up and walk out
I already feel like a whinny brat because I never “take his advice”. I just feel like there’s NOTHING I can do to change where my life is and where it’s heading. The post pretty much said it all… that I feel like he’s frustrated with me, and sick to death of me.
I don’t want to alienate him and make him really dread seeing me… although I think he’s already to that point now.
I want him to be proud of me… IDK I guess that sounds stupid.
And he’s not on it ALL the time … the excuse he uses is that it might be a client emergency… he gives us his cell number. But I mean come on… every session, or more than once a session?
How many are really clients and how many are personal?
Sometimes he’s just looking at something on there for a few minutes and then puts it down. Overall it gives the impression that he’s preoccupied with more important things.
Getting frustrated with him, thanks for being there.
Going to bed before I take it out on myself.
Night.
I guess he does it all day with people sits there and listens to their problems he probably just starts to have enough and zones out but hey thats not an excuse he picked that profession and im sure he like his big pay check so he should put his bloody phone down and show you some respect and let you know that you have all of his attention i mean god he can check it as soon as you leave he’s suppose to be there to help you. And your welcome night!