Introduction of myself and farewell

I am new here, both the website and the desire to end it. I am a seventeen year old male in the 12th grade. I have read many of the stories and thought it best if my story is out there somewhere, for when I am gone(even if no one I know reads it).
I have had a great life, that makes the feelings I have more confusing, both to me and the doctors. I move a lot and have little amounts of friends, but I am ok with that. I am very smart, especially in mathematics.
My life started its bitter collapse in May of this year. Up until then the only worrying factor in my life was my sexuality. I wasn’t attracted to male or female. I felt alone. All my friends talked about girls or guys and I just didn’t care. In May I felt a great change and fell in love with a girl named Molly. She is the most beautiful person I met. She is funny and smart. She is extremely talented. I was told by a friend that she also had a crush on me. I built up the courage and asked her on a date. She said yes. Pure joy and elation engulfed me in that moment. We spent the next three days together, inseperable. Best three days of my life. We went on a date it was also amazing. Just being around her washed all pain and worries away. She composed herself in a mature, but cute manner. She had flaws, but I also found those cute, the way she would sometimes rant about things and she had the cutest laugh ever. We saw each other every week in the summer then everyday before school. We had another date planned, but on August 16th my life ended.
She was my world. But she didn’t want me to be anything more than a friend. That reminded me of how many friends have forgotten me after I move away. I do not want to be forgotten by her. I found that the only way to cope was self harm. I cut every day for a month on my arms. My parents noticed and freaked out. They sent me to the doctors and I was put on medicine. It didn’t help. I went to therapy. It didn’t help. I talked to Molly again when she discovered I self harmed. She confided in me and told me she did too. My feelings for her intensified, yet hers remained the same. I tried to kill myself, but Molly talked me out of it. Knowing that she would blame herself for my choice prevented me. I came close again and was put into a mental hospital for a few days. I hated it. On the third day there, my parents brought me news: according to Molly’s mother, Molly had feelings for me, just her mom didn’t want her pairing off with any boys yet. I got better and was released from the hospital.
I saw Molly every day for a week. We went to a dance together and once again she told me all she wanted to be was friends. It killed me. I do not know why she brought it up. I was not pushing her to do anything. We were just talking.
Since then I have been avoiding her. It hurts to be away from her, but it hurts more to be near her because if her emotional distance. Every night since then I have been trying to kill build up the courage again. My cutting has been getting worse. My torso an thighs are pretty much just big scars.
I just want to thank anyone reading this for enduring my story. I hopefully wont be around by tomorrow. I know my story is not nearly as bad as others I have seen, but I am too tired of the pain of not having Molly.
Molly, I love you and I cant make it without you. I am sorry, but the pain is too much. I am giving up