I find myself coming onto SP more often
It used to be once every few weeks yet I’m finding that I’m on every day now
Truth is (as twisted as it sounds) I actually enjoy reading about other peoples misery.
I guess I’m looking for a reason not to kill myself by reading other peoples stories to convince myself that my life really isn’t so bad.
I don’t ever think that I’ve been through any more than anyone else has as everyone has their own personal hell.
I truely believe my time is up because everything I’ve gained has been taken away, obviously for good reason.
My kids have been put up for adoption against my own will, my fiance is on his death bed. I think I will wait for him before I gain the courage to finish myself
I’ve found myself attempting to help others as away of helping myself although it seems that when I do, I’m just getting myself down because now I’ve helped them and now they’re doing great and I’m STILL miserable.
This post probably makes no sense, but hey neither do these thoughts
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it makes totall sense!yes,it does.and if other people stories can make you feel better,you should come here and read them again and again.i wish you read my first post i made here,but unfortunately,i deleted it.but their are other posts you can read(authored by me),just find the older one’s.i am sure i am the one that have the shittest life here on sp.
I’m sure nno one has the “shittiest life”
As I’ve said, we all suffer our own hell
Try talking to a counselor who can help in person. Make sure that it is a good “fit”. Good luck. G.W.
I am currently talking to a counseller.
However there is more that I “need” than she alone can provide.
well, i have to admire one thing here….
you are willing to take care of/be by your fiances’ side in his condition.
My wife would step and spit on me if she had that chance, already has. Nevermind sticking with me, even though she knows I have health problems, she left me, wants to even make it so I can’t live economically, all while she is out fucking another guy.
Of course. Isn’t that what love is?
My mom did the same thing to my dad and now is doing it to my step father (not that he means anything to me) I don’t understand but I’ve seen it happen
@wifeisgone
Did you want your wife to be suicidal,like brokenangel? I think, i prefer my wife to be with another man,rather than being suicidal.and if you really love her?…….you should appreciate her “move on” with life decision.maybe brokenangel has something to learn from your ex-wife.
*just being realistic here*
lol… sigh.
@joinel: your reasoning is incompatible with WIG’s situation.
If a relationship ends on “good terms,” then i could see it being a valid suggestion, to say that you should be happy for them if you actually care about them…
But after someone has repeatedly shown cruel intentions and blatant disrespect and disregard for your well-being, with zero intention of ever making any amends, no apologies or even admission of wrongdoing… it’s pretty absurd to suggest that you should be happy for them to continue behaving in such a way.
You can only forgive someone’s repeatedly intentional transgressions so many times, before you say enough is enough. If you forgive someone over and over again, and they just keep doing the same thing again and again… then it’s not worth spending energy to forgive them; they clearly don’t appreciate or even value that forgiveness. If someone doesn’t care whether you never forgive them… why bother? Waste of time and energy.
@brokenangel:
this might not be popular to say around here, but i see your desire to find a reason to keep living, despite things being so bad, despite knowing things will get worse, as strength. I don’t think you need to convince yourself that the world isn’t so bad (because honestly, it pretty much is); i just think you need to convince yourself that even if the world sucks terribly (which it often does), there are still things worth living long enough to do, even small things. Sure, it might not really be “worth” all the anguish you’ll have to endure, for a sliver of contentment… but we don’t always get to choose how much those tiny morsels of peace will cost us. You can decide it’s worth having, even if you also admit that the cost is unreasonably high and unfair. But you have to be alive to make that choice. So i think it’s best to wait as long as you possibly can, and to be as certain as you can possibly be, before and if you do eventually decide to go. One thing i am certain about, is that it is worth being completely sure, and as ready as possible, and doing all you can, before then.
@joinel
I have nothing to learn from such a vile, petty woman.
Did you really just suggest that I walk away from the man I chose to gave my life to? The one I love….. the one that’s lying in a hospital bed fighting for his life and “move on”?
You’re kidding me, right?
@brokenangel.
Nice, girl !….i wish every girl was like you.but everybody has his own life style.some choose to always look for better,while others just choose one and live “forever” after.but angel,the problem is you are taking this love so seriously that,you are turning in to a love fanatic.i am saying you are a “love fanatic” not because you are taking care of your love at his worst times.but,i am saying you are a “love fanatic” because,your meaning for love has turned you “suicidal”.take good care of your love….? Yes,you should.actually….it may even be your responsibillity.but turning yourself suicidal…?,i don’t think that is the right way.
*religion fanatics are terrorists,and love fanatics are suicidal.and both of them are not heading the right way.*
People’s at this “hard time” will start thinking….what is life..?…why am i living for…?….just to end up like him or like her…? Some even may have some kind of mental illness,after this kind of “hard life” situation.and what i was asking you,when i said to you too “move on” was that,you should get ready to live the “rest” of your life,after your fiance is gone.you done everything you could,and when he is gone,it has nothing to do with you.and i am sure,seeing his lover being happy after his death will actually make him feel better.don’t you think that ?….but if you kill yourself after he is gone,the situation can make him depressed and “feel guilty” for what ever damage you will endure after your suicide attempt…..right ?…..it is hard,but sometimes……yes,*we just have to move on*.i will wish you a happy life “angel”,you deserve it.
im sorry you have to witness that.
once a whore, always a whore.
my wife had the gaul to also tell me (in the past) she wanted a second man in the ned with us. I was like (in my head, fuck you *****, is that what you think of marriage?) I didnt say that to her.
But that was my warning sign, which I ignored.
6 Years ago I caught her having an affair, she screwed a guy from her work.
She played the “Im sorry” mess, even cried severely. Who knows if she was even sorry. Later she told me “she came back coz i begged her” (she had moved out for several weeks).
I, like an idiot, forgave her.
Now, she just simply left me, cleaned the house out, I know she was having a second affair, clues surfacing, then she admits “Im seeing someone now” and our divorce is not even final.
In case you didnt read my other posts,Ill just add in the fact she “could survive with her own apartment if she didnt have to pay for my health insurance”, which she knows I need because of my health issues.
How is that for a woman???
i wish I had a lady as thoughtful and caring like you……. really.
My wife is total opposite…
after my suicide attempt, she came to the hospital alright, didnt want to be there though, looked me in the face and told me “Im only here coz your mom needed a ride”.
suicidal? you kidding me?
HELL NO
She would NEVER be suicidal.
I wish she was though, let her know the damage and pain she caused me….
and SHE DOESNT GIVE A FLYING FUCK, AND ENJOYS IT.
Joinel
I will not go into detail, but this situation and love is not what has made me suicidal. I have been since I was 14. I am now 27. I have lost my children to childrens services and they are now being adopted against my will and my fight.
Because I’m a single mom, no supports and have mental health disorders. The way I personally see it, if I can’t see my children and there is no love in my life then there is going to be a good reason for it