There are no easy answers to why we’re alive. Some people tell you to look at how bad others have it in other parts of the world, where there is REAL suffereing, but that doesn’t seem to work, does it. That’s because all suffering is REAL. Long ago, we became aware of both good and evil and we being in the image of God, aspire to good, but seem to fail all the time. We seem to have this internal measuring stick that makes us feel bad when someone hurts us or someone else. Yet at the same time we reject God because there are so many unanswered questions!
Who is God, where is God, why am I here, what’s the purpose of life? All we have is each day to make the best of. There are so many cliches to speak of and sometimes it just doesn’t even put a dent in the pain we feel. Some of us seek God or other things continually to take the pain away, but it never really goes away. There is this deep longing for comfort, for things being made right, but it never seems to come. It’s like a constant struggle to live and feel better, yes feel better emotionally, not just intellectually. You all know what I’m talking about, right. We’ve heard this and that and still the pain deep inside hurts so bad. It seems you can’t get help from anyone and when you cry out or deep inside, nothing happens. We feel so alone, so alone that not even God (if there is one) even hears us or cares anymore. It’s as if we’ve committed some truly horrific sin or were just born bad and predestined to fail or be unhappy. I have no answers and think of suicide every day. I pretty much just don’t have the courage to do it. I’d like to just take a pile of pills and fall asleep and never wake up. But I don’t, not sure why.
I”ll get up tomorrow and try again and by the end of the day, I’ll be anxious and frustrated. I’ll think about who I was ten years ago and who I am now and what my marriage and the divorce process has done to me. How I started out wanting the best for my family and just kept telling myself to do the right thing despite my wife’s constant attacks. Despite nobody believing me. You see, we live in a world where a woman can emotionally kill a man, because men like me are taught to respect and serve women, to make their wives happy so they have a happy life. But it doesn’t always work, sometimes you marry and evil person, but nobody believes women can be evil. So you go on and on until you’re broken and can’t stand it anymore. I’m done…
8 comments
I can relate when it comes to the wife part.
However, look at it this way….. evidently you married the same “kind” I did, and now I am realizing it is better to be rid of that than to be around it (my wife).
Im done and rid of her, Im glad she is gone, and Im doing better emotionally because of it. You will too.
I feel the same way about women, we are raised to respect them and treat them well, and while I am not perfect by any means, I do keep my priorities straight.
There are good women out there, really, but they are rare. I hope you find one to brighten up your life.
“…but nobody believes women can be evil.”
And yet, many of those very same people believe humanity began in the garden of eden, and that A Woman Named Eve was the origin of sin (and then they’ll defend her, claiming “the serpent tricked her!” but it’s still her fault for not behaving responsibly). Obviously women can be evil. Look around at the real world. There are countless examples. No one should be surprised by now.
The fact that so many people willfully ignore and blatantly disregard reality, is one of the most upsetting things to me, and is one of the largest and most significant causes of the problems in the world, as well as acting to perpetuate them.
I disregarded reality for 17+ years of my life. I believed the lie she loved me, cared about me, so, I am guilty of ignorance.
Girls love a guy who’s ready and willing to buy into the lie.
If you go around “waking people up,” identifying and vocalizing problems, they tend not to like that very much; as if i should just stfu, unless i can actually do something about it. The reason for speaking up, is that sometimes the person in the best position to find and understand the problem, is not in the best position to implement an effective solution, and those who have the means to implement the best solutions, might not even notice the problem, unless they happen upon someone screaming about it.
gosh it’s great when you speak on behalf of women, clevername, please tell me what else do we love? or are we completely incapable of love altogether? just looking for next best thrill? i mean i know i am…
“gosh it’s great when you speak on behalf of women…”
I know, right?
“please tell me what else do we love?”
The easiest answer to this would be: “everything i’m not.”
“or are we completely incapable of love altogether?”
Sometimes i wonder…
“just looking for next best thrill? i mean i know i am…”
So are you trying to imply that thrills are bad? Or that it’s only bad if it’s an unwanted, non-thrilling man, acknowledging women’s human nature? I can imagine that if a wanted man were to suggest that women love thrills, he’d probably be touted as a feminist, and held upon a pedestal, as an example to all the other inferior men… even though what makes him a shining example is actually not his attitude or acknowledgments, but rather his physical prowess and surplus of financial resources, which are things most of us cannot significantly improve, or even control.
Women don’t tend to like it when men feel or think or say or do, something other than what they want them to do.
When a man isn’t strictly adhering to every one of a woman’s whims, he’s a bad, inadequate man, unworthy of love or companionship.
When a woman does numerous inexcusable transgressions, they call it “woman’s prerogative,” and all we can do is tolerate it until they finally disappear (sometimes with ~half our assets).
I’m in the unique position to speak up, because i have no woman to lose, and no woman to gain. I don’t know any who would want me (at all), and i don’t know any i’d want (for anything beyond purely physical).
I still haven’t figured out why anyone should be upset or concerned by anything i might think about typical women’s behavior and motivations. I’m obviously irrelevant to all of them, so… why care?
Is it because my “opinion,” based on repeatedly, reliably reproducible observations and experiences… is actually accurate? And “they” don’t like that? They don’t like that anyone is saying something that goes against the “womanly image” they wish to portray? Perhaps.
Here’s the thing. God is not Santa Claus. You can not expect Him to respond to your Christmas list and the solutions that you have conceived of to the problems that plague you. If you want Him to be, you will be disappointed, doubtful, etc.
God is omnipresent. Your mind, your being, your psyche is not the one thing in all creation that has managed to exclude What is everywhere forever. When you demand your answer to your problem, you are, in effect, starting with the premise that God has permitted an imperfection to arise and that you are either it or in it. Therefore, your request is also based on blaming Him for your problem. That is not a very promising basis on which to petition the Almighty.
God is love. Love God with all your heart, soul, and mind. Don’t be reasonable in this. See what happens on the inside of the skull. Light.
G.W.
clevername — this is long, but please read it?
should probably point out that I don’t argue/debate with people, ever, really, because I recognize that many are too stubborn (and thick) to ever change their minds. I have no energy for banging my head against walls. While you definitely are both of those, you’ve lured me into your seemingly sensible rational, once again, and I want to respond to you just because you might somehow magically read this and realize your errors – but also I just can’t ignore such blatant disrespect towards, well, me (in a way).
“I still haven’t figured out why anyone should be upset or concerned by anything i might think about typical women’s behavior and motivations. I’m obviously irrelevant to all of them, so… why care?”
You’re not irrelevant. What you say/write/believe affects how you act in the world and the things that you do. These actions have meaning. Therefore, if you believe a lot of incorrect things about people, you might be less open to these people and will never change said opinions, but if you recognize that you might be not totally 100% correct in everything you believe, you might be a little more open-minded and have a better chance of forming relationships with various people IRL.
Number 1: Sarcasm is not the answer to everything, though admittedly, I am guilty of using it way too often as well. But you should watch out for when ppl misinterpret it
Number 2: I have no idea about what kind of searching for love you are doing and how you are meeting these women whom you judge so easily, but purporting any statement about an entire gender is generally not going to go over well with said gender, even if you were a part of that gender, mainly because we are all individuals, and people don’t like being spoken for (at least I don’t). Hence, my sarcasm. People say that stereotypes are useful, but I have never found this to be true, and even if you are basing your reasoning off of “repeatedly, reliably reproducible observations and experiences,” you could (and are definitely actually, but we’ll get to that in a bit) judging some women (perhaps whom holyyyyy shit maybe you have not met yet because I highly doubt you’ve met every woman in even your area, let alone the world or universe) not only unfairly, but incorrectly.
Number 3: Women do obviously like “thrills” (ie sex) because every sexual being does, and just like some men, some women will cheat and lie to get what they want. This is a matter of individual desire, though, and you can just never say that all women or men will act in a certain way, because it would be incorrect. That is also why statements such as these [[“Women don’t tend to like it when men feel or think or say or do, something other than what they want them to do.”
“When a man isn’t strictly adhering to every one of a woman’s whims, he’s a bad, inadequate man, unworthy of love or companionship.”]]
are just plainly false.
Number 4: Your arguments about thrill-seeking are just plain confusing, but I think I get the idea. Tell me if I misunderstood–you think that men w/ a “physical prowess and surplus of financial resources” can get away with acknowledging women as sexual beings, because I guess the usual stereotype is that we are all frigid, so then in doing so they would be making us more equal in some way? Whereas when other men say things like this, the tables are turned and these men are then accused of calling women sluts and liars?
Now, if I got that right, your argument is partly correct in that men w/ a “physical prowess and surplus of financial resources” ALWAYS get away with more in life, that is just part of life’s unfairness. However, like I said, any stereotype against an entire gender is probs not going to go down well with someone in that said gender (ie, me).
BOTTOM LINE —
We are all people. Individual people. We all have problems that we need sorting out. For some women (and some men), that problem is a lack of self-control and respect for their partners. But it is different for everyone. And if you actually search hard enough, you will likely find a woman, believe it or not, who both enjoys “thrills” and caring/loving/looking after someone.