Title says it all, i’m not really sure what i expect from here but i found this site when i was looking for the fastest least painful way to die. Â I’ve tried before, managed to stop my heart for a bit by drowning but my ex gave me CPR. Â Tried walking in front of a train but the cops arrested me for trespassing. Â Everything started getting better when i went to a shrink and got put on some meds, thing is i hear and see things no one else can they called it paranoid schizophrenia. Â The meds and shrink helped a lot but i lost my insurance months ago and had a relapse, a friend I’ve known for several years helped me through it till today. Â I only knew him over online, never met in person but we hung out everyday in games and razer comms, he was someone i could tell anything to and he never judged only tried to help. Â Well last night i had one of my bad days and lost it on him, he deleted me as a friend in all our games, and even on our chat program. Â Feel like he was my last line to sanity and now it’s gone from me forever. Â Again i don’t know what i expect i just had to tell someone in case this time i don’t fail, had to tell my story.
3 comments
Life is something you should love, and if you dont you should learn to love it. There’s a saying that says “be happy, even if your miserable, be happy your miserable” thats a weird saying yeah I thought so to. I’ve been lower than most and lemme tell you I can’t think of anything id rather do than help people like they did for me when I was feeling the same way as you. There’s always people who will listen, and be your friend. You just have to find them… I can listen? And if you go off on me dont sweat it, I’m hard to get rid of(:
you can e-mail me if you’d like to take that offer… k_33_boley@yahoo.com
just dont hold back on anything. Suicide isn’t the answer to anything sweety. Trust me. You can share your story and I’ll share mine . There’s absolutely no doubt I’ll hesitate to be there for you(:
hope it helps<3
Maybe he will come back… if it just happen last night give it a little bit of time… people do act impulsively when they are hurt.
Hard to be different.
My mother used to point out to me how many people diagnosed with a mental disorder were brilliant.
Research has shown that there is a fine line between schizophrenia and actually seeing the spirit realm, so that you literally see things that are real but in a different dimension that others cannot see.
My husbands grandmother was said to be schizophrenic. She could predict when any family members was going to die. She had a connection to the spirit realm that none of us had. She was told her world didn’t exist. Yet she had information none of us had.
During this short time (perhaps months until Obamacare) when you cannot get meds to keep you in “our” world, please accept that you are different, but not different than everyone. There are others like you. Call a helpline if you feel you need to. It is not a cure, but is a moment of help. They might not get you if they have not experienced it, but they are good people who could listen. Remember that you are smarter than you realize today, and you may not have even found all your gifts yet.