I finally became quite suicidal tonight. For years, I thought my dad and step-mom treated me horrible (they kinda did and do). i thought they lied to me about many things, and didn’t care about me. But i found out tonight i over reacted very badly about most things. I have a bit of a temper, so when i was angry at them, i would say awful things to vent to my friends. My dad found out one of the things i said about my step mom, and told me how messed up it was i said that. All she ever really wanted was to help me, but i always rejected it. I finally realized That i was in the wrong about so much stuff. She read what i said (i told my friend “i hate her so much i hope she f*cks herself with a knife and dies”). I didn’t mean that when i sent it, but it doesn’t matter now. I have never gotten along with her, and our relationship is very damaged. i feel horribly guilty and regretful, and nothing can ever fix this. No apology will ever fix this. the only solution i can think of to right this is to die and be forever out of her and my dads lives. I’m considering taking my entire bottle of Concerta
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6 comments
Perhaps now is a little too soon to mend the fence. Sometimes letting time pass can be a really big help. I’ve gotten into giant-sized disagreements with family members, pushed many of them away, and eventually was able to fix things with all but one or two. It taught me a lot about emotions… and how hard it can be to keep those emotions (verbal statements) under control especially when I’m going through heck.
While an apology might not work now while the problem is still on everyone’s minds, it might work at some point. It’s always worth a try. What’s the worst that can happen by trying to apologize?
It’s not enough. I hated them for ao long for all the wrong reasons. They never told me the reasons for thier actions, and i always thought that they were trying to hurt me. I thought that for almost 5 years. I told my froends, and they thought the same thing as me. Nothing i could ever do will ever fix this
You misunderstood or misread a situation. We all do it. It happens and it’s part of life. That’s why the word “mistake” exists… because we, as humans, all tend to mess things up sometimes. You now realize that you were wrong… and that’s progress because many people never realize when they’re wrong. Learn from your mistake and move on. When the time is right and opportunity allows, perhaps there will be some communication. Don’t sacrifice all of yourself for one misreading. Consider it a learning experience and move forward.
There is highly probable chance you can fix this issue with words and actions that differ from the ones that landed you in it. I am sure the family can forgive you as they have lived and made mistakes of their own. It may take a period of time for the emotion to settle to a peaceful level, but give it a chance or two
I suggest you all sit down with a therapist and just talk
Just talk to them and explain to them what you felt and apologize, if they have a heart they will understand, mistakes are made, you have to apologize and move on, don’t beat yourself you over something that can be fixed.