cuz that’s what drugs do. change you. alter who you are. every pill you swallow is another ocean of space between you and the rest of the world and most importantly: who you were.
Believe me I’m so sick of the pills. At this point I just don’t care anymore really. What else am I supposed to do? Quit and then die? I want that to be my very last option…if all else fails.
I know the feeling. Every time I saw the dr I got a new goodie bag full of drugs. She switched meds on me so quickly I don’t know which was responsible for what side effect. I can tell you I made a stash of all those pills and made myself quite the pill/alcohol cocktail. Pills made me lose my job, caused my panic attacks, and eventually drove me to attempt suicide. That was by far the worst time in my long term career of depression. I would research what they are giving you and make notes so you know the effects. Some of my mine made me so forgetful I would get lost driving home. My hands shook so bad I couldn’t use my I phone. Without the drugs with the exception of Wellbutrin and occasional sleep med I am reasonably stable. Best wishes sorry so long.
Yeah, I got the hand shakes bad too back when I was on meds. My hands have always been shaky but it would get so bad that I would shake food off utensils or a glass of milk so bad I would have 3/4 of the glass on my plate and myself. The steadier I tried to hold my hand, the worse it would get. It’s so embarrassing seeing people stare at you when it would happen. I refuse to take meds anymore because of it. I’d rather be miserable and unnoticed than have everyone look at me that way again.
lol uptown. And you know what kills me is that I don’t feel anything on these pills. So why take them? Just let the illness eat me alive for all I care :/
That was my experience too. The doctor would try one, up the dose, try another, up the dose, etc but nothing worked. I finally just said they worked because I was tired of them worried more about the pills than me. I stopped altogether as soon as I was on my own.
Counselors, etc never helped either. A trusted friend was 10 times better than any professional mind jockey.
13 comments
if you don’t mind may i know what are ypu suffering from? please don’t be offended.
Lol…it’s ok. Nothing majorly fancy, depression, anxiety, possibly ADD. I’m on medication for bipolar people but I’m not bipolar.
oh…okay
i was asking you ’cause i had BPD and was on medication as well…
so…why are you depressed dear?
You can trust and tell me…
Lol I don’t even know where to begin. Some of it isn’t even good to discuss publicly on a website lol. Not that I don’t trust you 🙂
hmmm yeah right…
new script; new character; new performance
cuz that’s what drugs do. change you. alter who you are. every pill you swallow is another ocean of space between you and the rest of the world and most importantly: who you were.
Believe me I’m so sick of the pills. At this point I just don’t care anymore really. What else am I supposed to do? Quit and then die? I want that to be my very last option…if all else fails.
I know the feeling. Every time I saw the dr I got a new goodie bag full of drugs. She switched meds on me so quickly I don’t know which was responsible for what side effect. I can tell you I made a stash of all those pills and made myself quite the pill/alcohol cocktail. Pills made me lose my job, caused my panic attacks, and eventually drove me to attempt suicide. That was by far the worst time in my long term career of depression. I would research what they are giving you and make notes so you know the effects. Some of my mine made me so forgetful I would get lost driving home. My hands shook so bad I couldn’t use my I phone. Without the drugs with the exception of Wellbutrin and occasional sleep med I am reasonably stable. Best wishes sorry so long.
Yeah, I got the hand shakes bad too back when I was on meds. My hands have always been shaky but it would get so bad that I would shake food off utensils or a glass of milk so bad I would have 3/4 of the glass on my plate and myself. The steadier I tried to hold my hand, the worse it would get. It’s so embarrassing seeing people stare at you when it would happen. I refuse to take meds anymore because of it. I’d rather be miserable and unnoticed than have everyone look at me that way again.
I was also given bipolar stuff, anti-psychotics, hypnotics, benzos, I could go on if I could remember 🙂
Great lts have a pill party. Ill dring the beer
lol uptown. And you know what kills me is that I don’t feel anything on these pills. So why take them? Just let the illness eat me alive for all I care :/
That was my experience too. The doctor would try one, up the dose, try another, up the dose, etc but nothing worked. I finally just said they worked because I was tired of them worried more about the pills than me. I stopped altogether as soon as I was on my own.
Counselors, etc never helped either. A trusted friend was 10 times better than any professional mind jockey.