I swore I would never come back to this site, yet here I am. I feel ready to die. I have a note typed on my laptop. I have a plan. I wrote out what I want at my funeral. The next step is the biggest though and I think I am scared. But maybe I am more scared of living than dying.
27 comments
myheartandotherblackholes, what do you want a your funeral? and i’m curious why it makes a difference you won’t know anything after your dead, nothing.
Firstly, I want to be burried, lilac flowers, and I definitely want Skyscraper by Demi Lovato and Lost Boy by Ruth B played at some point. And because I haven’t been in control of anything throughout my whole life, I want to be in control of this
hum? i understand the concept, when i was younger i wanted to be burred in my black leather jacket, and with a carton of cig’s, i wanted them to play Midnight in Moscow.
thing’s have changed since them days, now i don’t want nothing, just to be cremated and spread, nothing matters once your dead, if they dressed you up in a bikini it wouldn’t matter. things only matter when your alive. the only time being in control means anything is while your alive.
I used to want to be cremated too but then I was “no, I want a gravestone” I guess you are right about not being in control, but I want to be remembered for what I like/enjoyed, not how I died
I suppose it’s not really for the fact that ‘it doesn’t matter cos you’re dead’. I think the point is that right NOW, you’re planning it. Right NOW, you know you’re making things the way you want them. Right NOW, you’re in control. Even if you won’t know whether things will go the way you want them to after you’re dead, right now you’re calling the shots. Is that right, myheartandotherblackholes??
ZeldaSky, exactly!
🙂
Yes ZeldaSky you are right
food for thought, it really doesn’t matter, OK a tombstone nobody will come to visit, when do you go visit anyone? and your remains are in a tomb under ground they can’t intermingle with other substances, when i die i want to return every thing back to the universe, so i can be a part of it. any way you look at it, it’s crazy thinking! 🙂
I have nobody to visit yet and I wanted to be part of nature too but then decided I wnated to be kept whole somehow
isn’t it funny we care about things and what happens after we die, but we don’t care about what happens while we are living? i think it our way of accepting being dead, and it makes it easier to die, another form of yeah! it’s OK to die! or something? you know i’ll destroy myself then i’ll have nothing to live for! yeah then it will be easier to kill myself!!!
I’m sorry but this comment is about to be completely irrelevant to your post. I saw your username and thought of the book, so I looked at your other posts and saw that on your first one you said that that book was what led you to this site. I didn’t comment on that post because I was worried you wouldn’t see it, but anyway, I read that book a couple months ago and it is also what led me to this site. Sorry for the randomness, I just really found that interesting.
bloodstainedlips, very interesting! i have no idea WTF your talking about 🙂 i didn’t read the book, but i believe there is some kind of connection?
It’s about a girl who finds a suicide partner on some website. I was like “Do these websites actually exist because if so I’m in.” and I found this instead haha
Yes! This is exactly what lead me to this site too! I thought the book was incredible and yes, I was totally like “if I can find somebody then great” in a sort of sick way :/
Being laid to rest while wearing boots would be nice, that way you died with your boots on.
I like the idea of being eaten by animals, too. Lions, tigers, sharks, it doesn’t matter. There’s something nice about becoming a meal. The ultimate form of recycling, ya know?
Barring all that, cremation is a good way to become reduced to nothingness “Ashes to ashes, dust to dust”. Fitting into an ashtray seems like the economical choice.
I wouldn’t worry too much about what you’re wearing or how your make-up looks at your funeral, no one’s gonna try and date you at that event. (If anyone does, they’re probably not right for you).
Haha the dating comment made me laugh, I guess becoming part of nature again would be wonderful
In my family, we just burn everybody to a crisp. In fact, my Dad’s ashes are in the trunk of my car.
Dad really tried to make sure everything was planned out to the smallest detail before he died. He wasn’t dead a week before everything came unravelled. It’s been five months and I still have many more meetings with lawyers ahead of me.
No plan survives contact with the enemy, as they say.
Sorry to hear you at walking down that road, but, believe me, I understand it.
I’m sorry to hear about your dad, it’s surprising how long the meetings and everything goes on for
Morris, cool you know my email is recycling for that very reason, i’m not sure about getting eaten though? then you get shitted out? 🙂 and are a turd!!!!! ha ha! ashes being spread sounds more appealing to me!! it really doesn’t matter, but a piece of crap!!!! doesn’t make me feel any better!!
@Rocketman; Hey, at least you were a free meal that provided nourishment for a hungry carnivore. I’d call that a contribution.
@See Smith; I can relate to the planner types. I’ve already paid for my final expenses (standard issue cremation with the ashes scattered at sea. I’ll need to die in a specific county though, I went with a mom-n-pop funeral home. I can’t die more than about 80 miles away or I’ll void the contract). It’s nice knowing I won’t burden anyone with unforeseen expenses. Death can be a costly ***** for the living, I’d rather not inconvenience others because I’m recently dead.
well i can’t denie that! either way you will get devoured in some shape or form. it’s the turn thing that gets me!!! 🙂
turd!
Sometimes I feel like my own thoughts of suicide are about taking control of a life that should be mine. Kind of ironic I guess. As to the body, I will probably die in a way that will leave me out as food. I don’t care about becoming a turd. In some ways I’m mostly a bacterial culture anyway, at least then part of me lives on.
Paradoxical breathing, a part of you will live on! guaranteed.
I’ve started to think about all the little details afterwards too. Just last night I was looking up what happens to my student loan if I die. Luckily for me, in this country, it just gets written off.
Yes, I wonder what will happen to all of my belongings and money and everything