This was sopossed to be a time for both of us to get our shit together. This was sopossed to be a time to grow and heal individually. But i dont fucking care anymore. Because you dont. You lie about sleeping. You stay up all night and dont even sleep all day. I send you money to fix the door. You cant even measure it. You say your gonna get a job but you dont bother looking. You literally sit there and dont take care of yourself and that was our ONE fucking promise to take care if ourselves.
And it fucking hurts me everyday to just wake up and get out of bed. But i still do. I eat. I clean. I keep busy. I was going to job hunt today but now im sitting here fucking crying because you think im a hopeless angry *****. But dont i have a right to be upset when the man im in love with doesnt take care of himself?!? If i never slept and ate and if i just sat around cutting myself and drinking and doing drugs youd be oissed off too. Youd be fucking upset that the woman you love is self destructing. So you know what. No more. Fuck food. Fuck sleep. Fuck getting a job. Fuck cleaning. Fuck everything except this weed im smoking and this couch im sitting on. Im done. You want stubborn never gonna change zoe well you fucking got it buddy.
Was even going to start counselling and become better for you. But if you think im never gonna change theres no fucking point. Your the only reason i kept being productive. The only reason i even wake up everyday. And you cant even do the same things for me. So fuck you everything i do im done doing.