Christmas

So Christmas is coming in a month it’a one of my least holidays because I’ve never had a good one. I” trying not to let stuff get to me, but I can’t help but feel anxious to think that something bad will happen. Each year that I’ve had with that holiday has gotten worse and worse, from Crying myself to sleep, to a death of a friend’s family member t hospitalizations. At this rate I’m either hoping for a redemption or the sweet embrace of death (not by suicide.)