I feel empty
Giving myself to random men
But not giving myself at all
Innocence was once when everything underneath was only for me
Only for my true love to see
Now, everyone knows my body
Without touching my body
The loneliness doesn’t quit
And it becomes an addiction
I can’t get rid of
To fill the void that I suppress
How I wish I could love
I cannot feel that anymore
That was lost when you left
I can only recognize love if it hurts now
I tell myself
The man on the other side should care
The man on the other side should love
I shouldn’t have to give myself to anyone else
But that man who shows me romance
If love does not hurt
Then it is not love to me
I must be in pain
I have to feel misery
If I’m not obsessed
Then it means nothing
Nothing
That is what I have become
As I keep allowing them to get inside of me
Making them believe I crave them
When I really just want to feel something
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4 comments
I..I…i… i don’t know how to respond to this
it’s beautiful, but it’s sad, somehow it comforts me, yet it’s so painful
a “thank you for sharing” seems cruel, like i’m “grateful” for your misery, when you deserve good to feel more, and anything but that….
i feel like i want to say sorry, but somehow that word has no meaning for this…
if only a tear could suffice…
This is exactly the same or me. Love means nothing to me if it doesn’t hurt. Therefore is always think about love in horrible places like eternal hell, only love in such situations means annything to me because it means someone is with you when sinking deeper is impossible.
it…scares…me
So, so painfully true.. Agonising in fact.