Sitting here alone as usual, and I just had this weird scene flash through my mind, I’m lying here for my whole life- day to night, day to night- and I’m aging, alone, and then I shrivel up and die. And I made myself sit alone my whole life, and I could have made it better and at least distracted myself but I didn’t.
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Not that it matters
Today was my birthday
Happy birthday! 🙂
I’m not really sure if that’s the right thing to say. People saying happy birthday to me before used to make me angry, I was like “if I wasn’t born I wouldn’t be this unhappy! And all you’re doing is just reminding that I was born on this damn day that I first started my existence of depression and pain” but now I’m more like “another year closer to death, sigh, not long to go hopefully ”
How do you feel on your birthday?
Thank you : ) And it was actually yesterday, I was just working until late at night. I just don’t really like telling people I’m around because then they have to pretend to care and it’s not fun. I remember when I was a kid I liked it, because it was nice to feel special