17 years

next Wednesday is my birthday and I will turn seventeen. normally on birthdays you get to spend them with your family and friends. but I don’t even know if I want to do just that. my mom is back on her cycle of taking pills with fireball and my brother is a ticking time bomb waiting to blow. I wish I could have a birthday like it used to be when I was little and my life wasn’t complete chaos. the only good thing going on is the fact that I am falling hard for this boy. he seems to see such good in me that I don’t see in myself. I’m used to hearing how much as a mess I am or how I do nothing right. but he tries to show me how wrong I am for thinking that. I just don’t want to drag someone into the world of crazies I live in. someone with such a good heart doesn’t deserve to be dragged down by a problem like me.