I just felt so hurt and betrayed. I went down to the beach, loaded up on benzos, blacked out and woke up in my own bed. The next day (today) i took it upon myself to stop playing the victim like i have in the past and set out to find the person who was supposed to help me. After a long search, and a brief confrontation, i found them, and now i will get what i need. The circumstances are less than ideal, but i will manage. I will not play the victim anymore. I have the power to direct my own destiny. Maybe not completely control it, but to set it on its path of most likely success. Im still angry and feeling betrayed, but at least i will get what i came here for. Thanks to everyone who offered me kind words in my dark moment. Im feeling better now just knowing that i will get what i need. Assuming those i am counting on follow through. God willing. I was so afraid of what would happen were i to leave without receiving the help i need.
3 comments
Don’t worry about it, we all have our low moments. It doesn’t make you weak or pathetic to show that side of yourself. In fact, it takes a mature character to be able to let one’s feelings out like that.
Seeking help in your time of weakness as you did also allows us here to try to help, and possibly improve your situation. Bottling it all up like some do only makes things worse.
Thank you that means a lot, I always feel a bunch of shame and regret when I lose it like that
I’m glad you found the help you need. 🙂 not easy to do, not easy to ask for either. 🙂 you can and will get through this. 🙂