i cant tell my friends these things

i need to cut now
but i have a thing next weekend that has me showing my arms, and i dont want to cut anywhere else
it feels good to cut my arm
theres still scars from 8 months ago
i dont know if the boy i think i love cares enough
i want to delete all my social medias and stop talking to people
i want to sleep
and not have to worry about school or work
or family
we are dying
i hate it here