So for a while now, probably a couple of months I’ve been crying every single day about something it could be the littlest thing but I just start crying and I just going to this episode of hating myself and wanting to just be alone and away from everything and everyone and then it turns into anger and then anybody who tries to help me I give a attitude to. And I do know that I’m clinically diagnosed with bipolar depression But for years it’s been under control and I’ve learned how to control it so much that years ago the Psychiatrist felt like I didn’t need any more medication and it was good for a while my emotions were pretty much under control and I had normal emotions. But that only lasted a while because I have been hiding my depression a lot but it’s never been this bad I’ve never cried every day of my life for months and almost like three or five times a day and it’s tiring and my head hurts and my body sore And I always feel like I’m tired or sick but it’s just because I’ve been crying so much and I don’t understand it I feel like I can’t even go outside anymore even though technically I really can’t because of the circumstances of the world right now but say we weren’t in quarantine and I had to go outside I probably wouldn’t because I’m scared that the smallest thing is going to hurt me or make me sad or anger me and then I’ll just go into an episode out in public and then hate myself even more than what I already do. I’m just confused on why this is happening and I want to change it because it’s taking a toll on my body And on my brain If you read this thank you have a good afternoon stay safe and wash your hands
4 comments
i do not claim that it helps.. but try it.
it is not about “making your brain fixed”, it is about control
of course medication is another way,
do the breathing technique when you are alone.. trigger yourself, first with relatively low intensity negative emotions (memories), deep breath in and out couple of times and listen to the noise that it makes.. do it couple of times a day.. if you could control then use more intense memories.
do it with less movements and noise
do it in public.. among family member.. with no indication or memory invocation
seems stupid, but works for many
it does not solve your problem, but sometimes you can solve the problem itself the other way around: by removing its signs
i have plan to finish myself but i didnt want to do it soon.. but with this corona $hit i really started to consider it.. i work on electrodiffusion, charge relaxation and this sort of stuff, like them. the only thing that makes me keep going..
Hi, thank you for sharing us your story: this is very brave of you. When you’re not alright, hiding it is the worst thing to do. These things can’t be kept inside and I appreciated reading your post. It made me feel quite emotional. I understand your confusion. Know that you are not the only one, that many have been through this and have thrived. This is a time for you to grow stronger. All you need is patience. Today you do not know why you are crying so much; tomorrow, you won’t know why you have conquered your darkness. Just hold on, find someone to talk to and don’t stop believing that, sooner or later, it’ll be ok. Love from Canada. ??
Hi, thank you for sharing us your story: this is very brave of you. When you’re not alright, hiding it is the worst thing to do. These things can’t be kept inside and I appreciated reading your post. It made me feel quite emotional. I understand your confusion. Know that you are not the only one, that many have been through this and have thrived. This is a time for you to grow stronger. All you need is patience. Today you do not know why you are crying so much; tomorrow, you won’t know why you have conquered your darkness. Just hold on, find someone to talk to and don’t stop believing that, sooner or later, it’ll be ok. Love from Canada.
I’ve been crying every day. I don’t know why, but I assume it is because I was attacked at gunpoint by the sheriffs department last year, when they held 6 machine guns to me. I just ignore it because I know I am going to kill myself anyway as soon as I get the chance, I’ve been waiting for 13 years to kill myself. I was supposed to kill myself by shotgun to the head no later than July 28, 2012. I’m very upset to be alive still as I have absolutely no reason to still be alive and I hate everything about everyone who has been stalking me and forcing me to be alive and they are honestly the only reason my life has always been so god d*mn disgusting.