Too tired to sleep

A rant. I don’t do them, but I will this time.
I’m exhausted from lack of sleep, night by night. This insomnia is a monster. Because I don’t sleep, I also don’t eat. Which makes me… probably anorexic. Yes, I’m guilty when I eat)I could care less how its labeled. The anxiety builds up naturally, then peaks at night. Which is conveniently a great time for my old friend depression to sink its fangs into my skull. And without a  good old strike of OCD where would I be? You combine all this and PTSD shoots through the roof. Flashbacks, yeah,  no sleeping tonight.   My brain= Nope, you’re not going to be sleeping, and you cant eat its wrong, you need to be aware all the time,  in case something worse than indescribable mental pain happens to pounce on you at night. Oh and *** forbid.  Careful you don’t hit rock bottom again, you know what happened last time-//
I don’t feel anything. Except I do, that’s the horror.