Acouple of hours ago I had a crazy idea. I took a penknife and tried cutting myself but the pain woke me up and I stopped. Why is it painful to cut myself up. Maybe I didn’t have the courage to end myself. Again, cowardice got the best of me.
Looks like my second attempt ended in failure. Sure enough I am still searching for a painless death. For I am such a coward to even die.
Life is meaningless yet I’m scared of pain.
Maybe it’s not death that I wanted, maybe I’m just seeking for attention or maybe validation.