i have only realized quite a while ago that what ive been and am going through is genuine real abuse. though even before that point, each time i asked for help it was ignored completely. with this and all other failures in my life, how am i not meant to think that its all worthless
i am tired of needing to be strong and im tired of hearing about how brave i am for “keeping it going” when nothing is going anywhere
i sometimes do consider asking for just a little more help but the want to is always intertwined with this fundamental fear of rejection. i do think i am just broken entirely. not just in a way where you just feel broken or say it for the dramatization but im just not built to live like this. everything is exhausting. how long am i supposed to ask for help until someone either says its futile or it does get fixed