I missed you guys yesterday. As tragically ironic as this is, these posts give me a small ounce of hope that I don’t get anywhere else, from anyone else. It gives me that tiny bit of strength to get up and decide if I want to live today. I don’t feel like I’m alone in the world when I’m on here. I hate feeling alone…and although I have a family and a significant other, I still feel lost and desperate in this cold world, even when I’ve had a “good” day, it still doesn’t feel good enough. My smile is only temporary…its inevitable that it will fade and my life will one day end…I get up to face the day not because I want to but because I have to…and that is what scares and worries me the most…is there a light at the end of the tunnel? I don’t know. You guys are my hope. Don’t change for anyone.
-love
Unstable
2 comments
Touching stuff here….there’s a lady on youtube who talks to large groups, arranges cruises…her name is Esther Hicks and the main thrust of her talks is Law of Attraction.
May not seem relevant to what you wrote but when you start to watch the various clips, you may find a common thread that helps clear up some things for you and yes, allow hope into your life. You sound very kind, and sensitive and definitely deserve something to lighten up your path. She talks about everything from suicide to living and attracting what you truly want into your life. I hope you’ll check it out and that it lifts your spirit some.
We hate being alone!
Worse, is the thought of dying.
My beloved companion is a Yellow Labrador Retriever.
He is 10 years old now.
Almost every time I look at him, I think “He is going to die”.
It’s a HORRIBLE feeling.
I don’t know what to do abt it.
I know I am going to die, too.
That’s a horrible feeling, too!
So how to stop feeling horrible?
The cruise idea is not doable to people without funds.
And other reasons, too!
People I have loved have died.
Memories of them are with me.
One by her own hand. She was so unhappy. She was hurting.
She went back to drinking. She gave up on herself.
How can I make it better?
Light at end of the tunnel is truly a description of depression.
What are we to do?