Is a new day. There’s a  snow day for freezing rain so there’s no school.  I could still be sleeping right now if I really wanted to..
But that’s not anything that makes me happy, or even pleases me in the slightest. Really, I couldn’t give a damn if I go or not.
It’s hard to distinguish my emotions anymore. I’m smooth and sly on the outside, but on the inside I scream. Scream for something better. A life which does not chose to go against me. I guess the drugs don’t really help that..
MDMA is my DOC And I’ve been using frequently in the past week and a bit. Used to buy so much of that crap. I’d do it with my ex. Someone who said I’d always have him to lean on and left…
“Have fun with your craziness”. Thanks Kyle, you too. You’re the one who’s taken Valium, and who takes medication for anxiety and depression.
I do M all the time now.. I did some at 7:30 this morning.. All I can do is run away inside my head  for now…
3 comments
Thats always been my DOC, even though I used more of other substance’s along the way. If I had my choice it would be MDMA.
I’m 51, and hadn’t taken any E in 18 or 19 years. Roomates brings this girl home and she had one capsule.
It was a big dissapointment, yes I felt pretty good, yet wasn’t any where near the strength of the X we were getting in the 80’s and early 90’s.
But reality is this, the absence of MDMA caused me great depression, the day after was terrible, when I woke up .
Drugs are a temporary escape.
Thing is they rewire your brain which makes all feelings different in the long run.
You get used to the high and coming off it makes the downs worse.
But I cannot knock you because I’ve used other dangerous methods to feel something.
I’d recommend trying to come off with help because you might either OD or it may change your mind so much that you have to be locked up or something.
Even though it may not happen to everyone safety is paramount.
Yeah. There’s rehab for that. Apparently.