Falling..I’m falling again..Into loneliness…That’s fine….I’ve learned to excepted it…I lost my hope…my will…I learned that nothin’ l do will change it, and that’s fine. l’m not sad…nor am l happy. l only have a feeling of emptiness…despair and hatred don’t linger inside me…l’m not jealous or angry…nothiness is what l feel, but that’s okay..for l’m dead inside. Life is meaningless to me. l have no purpose..no reason…no hope..no one…nothing…not a single thing in sight. Being alone changes someone. It reminds them of the horried truth that is the human heart. For hope only brings despair. Trying only brings failuar. Love only brings pain. And friendship only ends in loneliness. lf l was to ask for a reason to live l would only give myself false hope. lf l was to long for someone to love that would only bring greater despair and emptiness. So l choose not to. For if l did it wouldn’t change the fact that l’m still alone in the end.
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I always wonder what would be better… To feel numb to emotion or retain emotion. As someone who is very emotional – I often wish I was numb. But people that are numb typically say they wish they could feel.
The grass is always greener
To Protoryu – As someone who alternates between feeling and unfeeling, I’m firmly of the opinion that not feeling is better. It’s not like I get the good feelings anyway so why suffer the bad ones?
To Disappearing – At the end of the day, we’re all alone. If you can learn to be fine with that then I’m glad -or at least I would be if I could feel that – but I think you get the idea. I guess, what I’m trying to say, is that I’m somewhat envious of you. I haven’t quite gotten there yet. Good luck.
I envy the numb people sometimes
Numbness is a rational way to be.
But it does bring the danger of possible self destruction.
If a person wants to live, I’d recommend they let the feelings flow.
Because feeling nothing may lead to either active suicide or actions which may cause ones death by other means.
To Protoryu – I know the feeling.
To U.U.Owens – I can’t speak for anyone else, obviously, but actually I’ve noticed that I’m less destructive when I’m numb – both to others and to myself. I just don’t see the point in killing myself – it serves no purpose. But then I’ve always been lazy so maybe it’s that?