I was cleaning out my room a bit before I went to school today. I found a blade. I washed it up and just sat there staring at it and finally couldn’t handle and cut.. It was so easy… So easy to do it and so easy to ruin my goal. I haven’t cut in 3 and a half months. I just ruined it. I made a promise to my boyfriend I wouldn’t do it again. I just broke it…. Im lost/broken and sad…. I want to sleep for ever. I envy sleeping beauty!
-RawrImaTurtle..!
8 comments
You didn’t ruin everything. That’s a mistake, but we do mistaes all the time. One mistake shouldn’t lead to another. Stay strong 😉
Thanks. It’s just now that I have the blade. I don’t know if I won’t be able to stop again…
You haven’t ruined it. If you want to see “ruin it”, you should see someone try to quit smoking. They all get where they want to be in the end.
Why do you cut? In my darkest, most self-destructive moments, I never had the impulse to inflict physical pain on myself. Suicide, yes; but not the opening of wounds.
I cut and you didn’t ruin it. I’ve stopped twice now for over a month each time but I still began to cut again. You just have to try again and find something or someone that can help you.
@Vernum- cutting is a way for some people (including myself) to realive the pain that they feel. It creates a different kind of pain to mask the emotional pain that overwhelms them. Then it also becomes addicting so when someone doesn’t need to do it to cover their pain, but they can’t stop it is because they are addicted.
I know the exactly feeling. I’ve promise my brother Shaun(not biological) that I would stop. And today he doesnt ask if i am okay but he asks whats wrong now. I just have to tell him I rather not talk about it because I cant take the cussing from him again. But really if he understand the problems you’ve had he cant be too angry ok. Its been 3 1/2 months and you have shown your effort so try dont to worry
thanks you guys 🙂 and yah i was right… its hard to stop, again…. I’m scared to tell my boyfriend.. ugh… its just so nice when the blade touches my skin…
I told my boyfriend. He is scared because he can’t really help me because he lives in a different state. It is always nice when the blade touched my skin. I love that feeling.
Hey Morgan,
Glad to see you’re still around…long time to “see” as Dawg says…hahaha. I have nothing intelligent to say tonight…just wanted to say hi.
Hope life is treating you better….even if you’re not treating yourself any better….are there no butterflies left? Ahhhh…the other day I went out on my second story deck…up in the trees…and the neighbour’s tree was literally alive with butterflies…Red Admiral Butterflies to be exact….it was AWEsome. They were dancing and chasing each other…because of the overly warm winter we’ve had….this years migration is huge….red and black butterflies everywhere…and I have a whole tree full of them….right next to my deck…I love butterflies…lol
I told you I had nothing intelligent to say….lol
Lots of Love
Amakua