Does anyone hate the term “man up” as much as I do? I mean no one can really measure how much physical or emotional pain another human being is in and so all they say as advice and support when you’re in pain is “man up” like the pain isn’t real, like we’re not trying to feel better. Why can’t people just say nothing instead of saying potentially harmful things like “man up”. Don’t you think I’d pull myself out of this darkness and despair that I’m feeling if I could? All I’m asking for is a little help and the advice that gets thrown back in my face is “man up”. It just pisses me off. I don’t want people to pity me, I just want them to be there, to show that they care. Is that too much to ask?
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No, and it makes me mad too, I get yelled at for not being able to do things because it hurts to do anything and because I have no motivation at all, and then I get punished and they say they understand and they will listen when I am having trouble, but they never do, I dont get it.
Mine would be woman up but all I get is the “WOW you can handle anything, you are so strong, how do you do it?” Hell, I don’t. I have to woman up all the time. I’m supposed to have it all together all the time. I’m in that dark hell hole too and if anyone ever fucking noticed then maybe they would try to help me out.
I’m a girl, but i know how you feel. It’s so annoying when I hear things like “Be a man” What’s wrong with these people? It shouldn’t be so much to ask. Thing of it as this way: THEY ARE JEALOUS OF YOU.
I get treated the same way, though not “man up”. Um….people say that I need to snap out of this and all I can think is “Wow, easy for you to say cause you are not the one going through it. Don’t you think I would snap out of it if it was that easy?” I hate when people say that to me. Its like what I’m going through is just some itty bitty problem. And I also hate when people say they are there for you or will listen to you and when you need them they don’t want to be there for you.
Yes, I despise the phrase “man up”–so much of what is wrong with society is contained in that little phrase…
It’s their way, whether they realize it or not, of saying the group needs our contributions, but can’t be bothered expending significant energy on our problems. They see we appear whole, so they assume we should just “work.” They’re frustrated and totally unaware of what’s happening with/to us.
It’s no excuse, of course, but I think that’s what’s happening often. I’ve stopped sharing, as the words I get back usually feel like strong acid on an open wound.
But a buddy of mine recently told me he’d shoot me & would enjoy it. He was dead serious. So I guess there’s no real winning.