I hope this is the final revelation followed by action, for what is a revelation in itself? I see a universe inside me and there is a god there, he was’nt there when I was born but with each passing day he took birth and grew stronger. And I am not saying this in a good way. The loop is in me, there is a disconnect in my brain and it is tough to mend it.
The solution is to let me go. Beg for wishes like we always do, but this time beg your own self for things, for you are all there […]
how weird, i am free and independant and yet i cannot do what i want. it is like i have this fake freedom, i have the freedom from all the people who can bind me, voluntarily or by force. but i just cannot be free of myself, i cannot not hold myself back. sometimes i feel i can only be as good as i want me to be. i feel so enormously sick when my strongest of emotions fail to lead into action. my eyes may well up with tears for something and my heart would be convinced about that, yet it all falls flat […]
i am in pretty bad shape too man….i can feel you and see how many you and me there really are, imagine the total grief and helplessness and hopelessness in this world man, it is enough to be a world in itself, maybe that is what hell is. maybe hell is the collective weight of all peoples’ failed aspirations, expectations and dreams, maybe hell is the all weighty almighty DREAM that was never chased. it just lies there, emptying slowly, its mass and thickness invading all that comes in its way, it comes inside you and me thijs, through the nose, close your eyes all […]
What will I type? What message am I oddly eager to send, although once I begin typing I have to force myself to continue. This terrible apathy that I have acquired, where I care not when I see my mother rotting away, a wasted life, why do I feel the need to add one more silly post in the thousands that languish here already. In this curious journey of reaching another state of mind, I find myself hating my apathy, oh the irony. All that we, the youth at least, need is a sense of purpose. And if not that, then we would oh so […]
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