I find myself coming onto SP more often
It used to be once every few weeks yet I’m finding that I’m on every day now
Truth is (as twisted as it sounds) I actually enjoy reading about other peoples misery.
I guess I’m looking for a reason not to kill myself by reading other peoples stories to convince myself that my life really isn’t so bad.
I don’t ever think that I’ve been through any more than anyone else has as everyone has their own personal hell.
I truely believe my time is up because everything I’ve gained has been taken away, obviously for good […]
In April, my fiance was diagonosed with HIV
Since then, I’ve watched him deteriorate…… fast. We’ve broken up a few times because a times, the stress got way too much for both of us.
In August, he was admitted to the hospital for an infection in his bowels and stomach. It then spread to his lungs and kidneys.
In October, he was transferred to a hospital 2 hours away. I don’t drive and have no income so I’ve seen him twice in that time. And of course it makes me feel like absolute shit.
2 weeks ago, he flat lined after a blood transfusion that […]
today as i was walking home with my friends daughter ( whom I live with) from school, we were walking behind a little boy (about 8 or 9 years old). he looked down a path and started walking faster. not even 10 seconds later, 3 boys about the same age walked out of the path and started taunting this poor little boy. calling him a “*****” (mind you, these are CHILDREN using such profanity) a “retatd” and so on.
now, hearing these names come from the mouths of children set off a flashback (i was teased and tormented in elementary school right thru to high school […]
There she lay
In the middle of the floor
With a hand full of pills
The dresser blocking her door
Tears of tourture
Stream down her face
Its finally time
She leaves this place
Her breath, more shallow
Her heart beat slows
She goes back to the place
Where the anxiety grows
She shuts her eyes
To see them standing there
And goes back to the time
When somebody cared
She hears the laughter
Of her childrens delight
And hears the sweet whisper
“I love you mommy, good night”
The little voices
Reek havoc in her head
Knowing she won’t hear them
She knows she’s better off dead
“Mommy, come with me,
I don’t like this at all”
She watched them drive away
Her fists strike the wall
“Please, mommy”
He cries
“I’ll be a […]
im not one to spill my whole life to anyonen nevermind a site full of strangers. but this has all built up to the point of me exploding.
first of i am a twenty seven year old single mom withs ptsd depression and severe anxiety. my kids sperm sperm donors want  nothing to do with them in exception for one whom she lives with
so heres my sttory and i apologize for the length. when i was only eighteen i had my daughter. i felt amazing about it….. until i found out that i had caught a virus and was severely handicapped and i was urged to […]