deathbybutterfly2009

I’m taking a class right now that requires me to write a persuasive essay on something that I’m passionate about.  I’m not really passionate about anything but I think about suicide most of the time.  That not really being a topic I feel like writing an essay about, it got me thinking further and I decided that, legalizing Euthanasia for terminally ill patients, would be a pretty controversial argument to present.  I would like to present it as being beneficial for the individual as well as society.  I am asking for anyone’s input on how they feel about this subject whether they are for it […]

I feel that I am in an ominous abyss, someone please tell me I’m not. I know that it is my own doing, but do not know how to climb out even though I wish to or just plain suffocate already. This paper bag of hope or maybe just faith is not helping the hyperventilation that comes on every time I look at reality and know I am alone; in an ominous abyss.

Sometimes it seems like my most painful thoughts are provoked by some of my happiest memories.  I am sure to be found crying if at first I was seen smiling.  At first, I just wanted the hurt to go away; to forget the painful memories.  Now, I will gladly be encompassed by them if I could only forgot that which made me happy.

I feel lost, entangled in a web in which there is no discerning truth from lies; reality from fantasy.  Am I going crazy?  Have I always been crazy? Or are we all trapped inside our own webs and that is just life?  If […]

I feel so alone all the time, even with a house full of people and even then, more so.  I don’t know what to do.  I don’t want to kill myself but I can’t stand being here sometimes.  I have had four beautiful children in which one has passed away years ago and feel that I have dealt with that for the majority of it but still end up feeling like their better off without me at times.  I don’t want them to lead lives where their mother committed suicide, I love them deeply and want the best.  Sometimes though even the alternative of suicide […]

Death is but crossing the world, as friends do the seas; they live in one another still. For they must needs be present, that love and live in that which is omnipresent. In this divine glass they see face to face; and their converse is free, as well as pure. This is the comfort of friends, that though they may be said to die, yet their friend ship and society are, in the best sense, ever present, because immortal.