when they get close….
i wonder when they’ll really see me. the dirty, stupid, dumb, irresponsible girl that i am. somehow it’s so much more easier to bring myself down then to bring myself up. it’s safe. it’s the truth. it’s my reality.
i even write stupid. none of this seems coherent at all.
they’ll see that i’m socially awkward.
after a while, they’d rather be with someone else rather than be with me.
because i don’t talk. because nothing fucking comes out. i’m boring. there’s nothing interesting about me. i don’t fit in. i’ve never fit in.
i don’t know why i do this to myself.
i know i am truly […]