Every night I lay down on my bed and tell myself that I’m not going to do it that I’m stronger than that, but then I break down, the tears start and I cry myself to sleep and every morning I tell myself that that was the last time
I just realized today that almost every decision that I make has two choices, the thing that i want and the right answer, the thing that other people want to hear you say. And I hate that looking at my life now makes me realize that I have never don anything for myself and I rarely get what I want because it has almost become instinct to just say what everyone wants to hear. And this kills me inside because I know that I can try and try to do what everyone else wants me to do but in the end, Im mot making other […]
I don’t know whats wrong, its like ive lost all motivation, i dont want to do anything, i dont care about anything, i feel like im just drifting through a world that doesnt accept me, and i dont know what to do.
I don’t see the point anymore, all I focus on now is school, and still at night I hear my parents talking. No one knows this depth of loneliness, to be invisible at school, to be invisible to your teachers, to even hear your parents say that you are hopeless. Its too much, I can’t do it. I just want the pain to end. If it wasn’t for the knowledge that the end of my life would be unbearable for my parents, they would have already buried me.