The only reason why I haven’t killed myself yet is my mother. She’d be crushed, and I don’t want to hurt anyone because of me killing myself.. I’m probably just going through a “phase”.. Well that’s what I hope… It sucks, I feel like I have a pretty bright future ahead of me: good grades, great Offensive Tackle, But I have basically 3 friends, and one of them is just done with me, and I don’t know how I fucked up so bad.. But some things are too much, my stepdad having stage 3 kidney cancer.. And earlier tonight, my “friend” had just said that […]
I’m back. It’s been awhile, though little has gotten better.. School is stressing me out, one of my close friends has gone distant, and the cherry on top: my stepdad (the only father I’ve ever had in my life) has Kidney cancer… I tried to tell my friend about it, and she flat out says “I don’t want any bad news.” And I’m dumbfounded, so I apologize.. For trying to tell her something important, what’s wrong with me? And how could a friend be so ignorant to another friend’s problem… Especially one as bad as a family member having cancer. Heh.. It’s easier to tell […]
It’s strange how someone you would least expect to have suicidal thoughts, actually does. I’m one of those people, I have no reason to be thinking like this.. I’m a good guy (I hope), I’m nice, respectful, have a few good friends…
Unfortunately for me, although no one thinks I have, but I have come to a complete turn around emotionally. I feel like I am worthless, like no one cares.. I feel alone, even with my friends… It sucks, I’m someone who’ll put on a façade and act like everything’s grand, whilst on the inside I’m completely mangled, and because […]