It has been 3 years with no cutting and today was my downfall. I never forgot how great the relief is that I get from cutting, but I tried to put it behind me and failed. I’ll admit this time I was scared, the cut was deeper than in the past and I had almost forgotten what to do. I don’t know what prompted me to cut again, maybe it was having to deal with some innate skeletons from my past that got stirred up in a counseling session, or maybe it was that my life is spiraling out of control. […]
I am consistently in pain and my thoughts are in a turmoil that would rival the fiercest of whirlpools. I have thought about suicide for upwards of 15 years now and I recently tried killing myself after walking out on my job(just couldn’t take the people). I drove my car through a guardrail and into a tree. After the failed attempts I went into a stint of self mutilation, usually burning in some fashion. Now, the burning no longer helps and day after day the thoughts of me ending it get stronger and stronger.
Why is it that when I look into my life I see […]