Rosebrider

I’ve been lurking here and there for a while now. Some days have been good and some days have been bad but I think it’s time for me to just leave SP for a bit. Ever since my suicide attempt back in November, things have been improving in my life.

Got a part time job that I truly love, going to grad school for a degree that I actually enjoy, and lost a lot of weight. Let’s just hope that this happy feeling keeps up.

Thank you for those who have been with me during a difficult time in my life. See you on the flip side.

It’s weird. After my suicide attempt back in November, things have been looking up for me. I got a job, going to grad school, getting good grades, and got into a field I really enjoy.

And yet, despite everything going right and being kind of happy, a part of me still feels like ending it all. I wonder why that is.

Just knowing that I might not be here in a few days? There is a sense of relief. I said goodbye to all the people I needed to say already and now I’m just about ready to leave.

its a shame though. If it weren’t for my mom, I would have left sooner.

There are some days where I’m feeling great and some days where I wish I could end it all.

Today is one of those days.

I really don’t know what to do.

Last week I tried to OD but that didn’t get anywhere. I tried to jump off of a two story building but I backed out because I was scared. I feel like lately my life as been going downward because I don’t know where to go.

I know life isn’t easy but it is nice to think about how you could end it all and not have to worry anymore.