what’s the point of reaching out for help if you can’t receive any what’s the point of being on earth when you will just be let down
I don’t know tonight I just feel super depressed and suicidal I just feel like I’ll be doing the world a favor if I go like I’m undeserving of love and undeserving of life I just want to give up
The thing with Paranoid schizophrenia is that you can never tell what’s real and what’s fake and the voices tell you that the people are coming to get you or that people are talking about hurting you or if you don’t do what they say your family will be hurt you believe the voices because they seem so real sometimes you see things that seem real too they are sometimes dark figures or people the only thing that really helps me is to think about things I like or blog it
I’ve tried eating but everything in my head says to stop that I don’t deserve to eat that I’m fatter than anybody in my family and everything that goes in my body must come out I don’t know what to do I’m just so lost my mind is winning and I’m losing the fight badly
At 19 years old I received the most horrific news that I had lost my boyfriend to suicide and I got so depressed that I tried to end my life to be with him but ended up in so much pain and ended up being sick my mom knowing something was wrong called 911 and I was rushed to the hospital where I was held for 24 hours then sent to a psych ward where I learned if I didn’t want to survive for myself I had to survive for him and now every time I feel like giving up I remind myself he would […]