Flirting with Death is a roller coaster ride in the fog – you can never see ahead, if Death will accept you or if he will turn you down. He has his own way of going about things, turning off the lights for a good man and letting a bad one go free, but Death keeps it simple. He will come for you when it is time. Not before. Not after. You can speed his process along by smoking or by drinking, slow it down by exercising, but even when you slit your wrists, cut your throat, shoot yourself – Death will not take you […]
It’s been a long time since I’ve felt normal. A long time, my friends, since life has filled my veins and captured me with the sweet essence of the promise of life. Since I’ve been the kind of girl to laugh in the summer sun or lie down in the sweet spring rain. To stop and smell the roses. And I don’t know what I am missing.
Sometimes I feel like an unfinished puzzle, left half completed on the rug of childhood; the girl with the half-life, with the skills to make herself great but without the drive to do so. They call suicide a crime, […]
Ready to die. That’s what I’ve been for a really long time.
I call myself ready to die. I’ve always wanted to die. Since I was 7 years old. I just don’t understand. I have a good life, considering. I am a straight-A student. My parents are not abusive; I have never been bullied nor hurt; so what makes me suicidal? Death has always been a goal of mine. Online, I’ve searched for poisons like hydrogen cyanide. I’ve always had a fascination with blood, too. My dreams are filed with gory images of me slicing people open while they scream. I’m obviously messed-up. I feel that […]