it seems that most people who know me realize that i have a death wish – which i do, but it’s just like playing the lottery, the chances are it won’t happen the way i want it – in my sleep tomorrow.
give me a break god, just take me in the next hour prior to waking up for work. please lord. amen.
i’m not sure why i’m posting this anywhere, since my view of everyone is that they’re all pointless in discussing things with or doing anything with.
I don’t believe anyone has any real power except those who are lucky enough to have had the right circumstances. I want to die so badly but can’t actually bring myself to making the jump off the building or in front of a fast truck. I can’t buy a gun, never seem to save the money for one or have the paper work filled out for a license.
It’s hard to not express how I feel, but it’s what has to be […]
nothing means anything to me everything means nothing to me.
words and thoughts and everything is pointless. i’m alone and other people are just nothing more than reflections that i allow them to be in my own head, and the same is true for everyone whether they know, or admit it or not.
so after all that i’ve…messed, or should i say, ‘fucked’ up, in this life, even death doesn’t satisfy something. even death is a downer. life is bad, death is bad, everything is bad. and then suddenly everything is good.
i’m an animal, i see that so clearly now. i’m probably predictable but not by anyone […]