I have no more doubts about my suicide anymore. I know that it’s necessary for me to leave this world to find peace, to end this misery. I’m filling up my time to avoid suspicion or hospitalization at the moment, so I’m just working on becoming fluent in German haha.
Oh, and an update. No matter what I do, it’s not fucking good enough and everyone still hates me. So really, nothing new. I still hate myself. Nothing good enough to live for. I’m always just going to be a failure, a shadow in the dark, good for nothing hopeless freak.