I know now love is nothing more than a lie we tell ourselves. For what reason do we have to live without it? I know the truth and now I know my answer. but then again, I have always known but I held on to more.
This time I accept the truth and I let go and know that I never really existed. For how can one have existed if no one remembers?
KR
I already asked my close friend this question….you know who you are and thank you for being you…
I am sorry……
For this message….but it’s not fair the tears he makes me cry….he is not worth it; so why do I cry? This coming from a woman that doesn’t even cry at a funeral….and that is the truth…except Casey’s…….
If for some reason you see this post…bc I know you follow me on here…. M….you need to contact me, directly. You owe me the decency of at least telling me via Skype…you owe me a lot, honestly, but this is not okay….none of this is okay….
Drinking yourself mad and then going to play in traffic IS NOT OKAY!!!!!!
Even though we have been through so much, I said, I would always be here for you…bc that is the person that I am. I don’t just walk out on people, I don’t just leave them high and dry, no matter the pain they put me through.
Please, […]
If only wishes could be dreams and all my dreams could come true…
Because this says it all….and I think, we can all relate to it:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Snooicil0aY
My Letter of Resignation….
To Whom It May Concern, (aka Life, the Universe, M.H., etc)
It may have come to your attention some time ago, that I am no longer happy. It may have come to your attention that I have no intention of staying around and being a puppet anymore.
As I type this, I realize, it has come to your attention, for you are the cosmic force that drives me further and further into my abyss of madness. You have pushed me into a Wonderland where the Mad Hatter not only makes more sense but is my counterpart in the void between. The Queen […]
Love is a memory
Forgotten in time
Love is a memory
A story, that I left behind
Love is a memory
Of all the lies that I ever knew, in lieu of truth
Love is a memory
On the digital analogy particles of my soul
Love is a memory
One I choose to lose
Love is a memory
That I will give back to the dark
Love is a memory
That once lit a silent spark
Love is a memory
In the wasteland that is, I
Love is a memory
In a forgotten corner of my mind
Love is a memory
Like that of […]
It’s going to take more than a stiff drink to do what I need to do… My life is on a time loop….erase and rewind because I am losing my mind.
I sit here, in a new house…with new furniture, and my dog and yet, I continue to be alone. The walls do not yet speak, for they have nothing to speak of. I’m lost in a world with sound that has no meaning; for I do not understand what is being said. I am lost on new ground in a void of blackness, although the sun shines. Colors faded in and out…and the colors I once use to see with music have all but disappeared. Where have I gone?
I wonder….
And I wait….
Always waiting….
The end of me is near….I feel it seeping into my bones; […]
You can wish in one hand and shit in the other and see which on fills up faster… KR
Death is a funny thing, death comes in all forms, in so many ways, that people do not understand. Death is a memory of a forgotten time; death is the loss of something we no longer have. – KR
Let me sleep in peace, I have earned that much.
Lay me down in a field of poppy’s and let me sleep… I want to be Dorthy today.
When the need to disappear outweighs the need to breathe.
-KR
There was a time in my life that I would have looked in the mirror, seen what I now once again see and run. Fly away…escape in flight, run back into the night, where in the end, I have always belonged.
Time is that ever horrible tick of deep space; that reminds me that I am worthless and nothing will ever change that. That there is only one path in the end. I’ve seen all the roads and no matter what, change will never come, for there is only one road in the end to be had.
Once again, the clock starts the countdown…for I now, completely […]
I’ve become silent because I have become lost even deeper within myself. I look through windows that are suppose to reflect my soul and yet, there is nothing to be found. The season change and so do I, as the wind grows colder, I become more bitter, more hollow, more and more alone. As my anger gives away to pure utter emptiness.
I have lost everything, within a moment. I have been used up for all that I am and all that I ever will be.
All I know, is I no longer see color, just diffused light within cloudy shades of gray.
I am all but a […]
I held on…through everything over the last year……I held on…being turned inside out…. I held on… giving it one last try as I hung on to nothing….I held on…while grasping for anything as I fell through nothing but open space…. I held on…as time keeps marching on, as it forgets me in it’s wake….
I held on…..because I know what it is like to be alone….I held on…. because I know what it’s like to have people turn their back on you… I held on…. as I cried alone…. I held on as my heart finished breaking as I held my infant son one last time….I […]
I find myself running in circles more often than not. I find myself giving myself away, again and again and again….always to the wrong people. I find I care too much because I am always trying to live for someone else. I find myself alone, even when, I am in a room full of people.
There is no action that I can make that will equal an opposite reaction; for all my actions only end up one way….heartbreak.
I’ve given all I can, I have tried all I dare to try any longer. I am not wanted, I am not loved, I am a human that […]
Everything always falls to shit for me…what else is new? I should be use to it by now…wait, I kinda am…but it doesn’t make it any easier when it happens….again….and again….and again…and again….
Screw you M, I stood by you completely; even when you lied to me time and time again. We lost our child and you shut me out when I needed you most. I am so beyond done at this point. You were not even there when I had to deliver our precious son because you were too consumed with your job and yourself.
I have come to realize there is no happiness…only misery that […]
“One-dimensionality exists only in theory as a mathematical value….and yet, that is how I see myself at times. As a mathematical theory based solely on an equation that does not truly exist; only in a discussion, represented in the form of a conversation that is neither, proved right nor wrong.” – KR
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