For your poems.
http://youtu.be/r7PndvLncZE
You know, until my mom committed suicide in ’81.
Freudian slip and funny disclaimer.
I look back over my shoulder
All I see is a past not worth remembering
And in my heart I know that I’ll never escape
The fear of my body growing colder
I see myself in all my pain
Hunched over the bathtub drain with
My blood pouring like rain
Down my arm to the sewer with all those who felt the same
And today I fight to keep at bay
The thought that demand I slay
Myself and those around who dared spout the lie that they cared
And end this life I hate today
So simple the old ways
To give in to hate and relate to life in the most brutal of ways
To berate myself […]
I am excited.
I need one hundred people to write me this week
And send me a love offering of $50 or more.
When you do something for God’s house,
God’s gonna put a miracle in your house.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5IakU3gHXbE
This is a journal entry that I wrote on the night of my 18th birthday a little more than a year ago. Recently I revisited it and I wanted to share it with you, both to hear your thoughts and to reaffirm my own. Here it is:
I’ve been thinking a lot about depression and by extension suicide lately. I’m not thinking of planing my own death (or rather carrying out the plans that I’ve already made). I’m just trying to think about it on an intellectual level. This is difficult because Suicide and depression are matters of emotion but I though I would try anyway. […]
On islands we all run
Onto islands in the sun
And the sun too: is an island
With islands all around
We’re all islands in the sea
And the islands want to reach
Other islands passing by
An island in the sky
On islands everywhere
All the islands ever there
Are all waiting on an island
That island stands alone
Silently, silently.
A teen not more than fifteen,
beaten and bruised,
lost and confused.
One who does not speak out,
but runs and hides.
Silently, silently,
she yearns for the missing young girl.
A teen not more than sixteen,
parties and people,
drugs and alcohol.
One who does not admit her addictions,
but hides behind them.
Silently, silently,
she screams for help.
A teen not more than seventeen,
taken advantage of,
hurt physically and mentally.
One who does not get help,
but remains quiet.
Silently, silently,
she wishes for relief.
A teen not more than eighteen,
broken and scarred,
self inflicted harm.
One who does not think,
but continues […]
When the world is a monster
Bad to swallow you whole
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zCvmS9Cb42w
Kick the clay that holds the teeth in
Throw your trolls out the door
“Suicide is man’s way of telling God, ‘You can’t fire me: I quit!’â€
― Bill Maher
“When you’re young and healthy you can plan on Monday to commit suicide, and by Wednesday you’re laughing again.â€
― Marilyn Monroe, My Story
“We cannot tear out a single page of our life, but we can throw the whole book in the fire.â€
― George Sand, Mauprat
“What’s the big fucking deal? Lots of amazing people have committed suicide, and they turned out alright.â€
― Emilie Autumn
“I simply wondered about the dead because their days had ended and I did not know how I would get through mine.â€
― James Baldwin
“She […]
Maude: Do you like sex Mr. Lebowski?
The Dude: Excuse me?
Maude: Sex, the physical act of love (coitus) do you like it?
The Dude: I was talking about my rug.
Maude: You’re not interested in sex?
The Dude: You mean.. Coitus?
Local posts, they list your friends
In order of disappearance
Lawn scattered tins feed birds:
The portions baked for absent guests
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KceYe4Dedbg
Mass edition icon
God sent comfort is your salvation
But who grants absolution for sins
That never were committed?
Call me, darling
Tension makes a tangle of each thought,
It becomes inconvenience
Sound never penetrates as
Servile edges break and faint
Dress lengths, assassinations
Fractured family ties and christenings
Tension
A thought mistaken for a memory
Clear the dust from smiles in boxes
Cross a patterned floor and recall their voices
There goes the plan
Take me from this place,
It’s not like yesterday.
It’s this gentle maze,
These corridors and caves…
Where did you go…
A timeless face in misty eyed disgrace.
Choking behind glass.
If you could turn around,
You could have it all,
But break your hands before you break your fall.
In these gentle waves there’s a feeling I’ve been saved.
But I’m drowning still.
Why did you go…
Cold.
Tired.
Sick.
Black is loneliness.
Air.
Oxygen.
Breath.
Black is keeping you alive.
Invisible.
Gone.
Ghost.
Black is all that is left.
Silent.
Misread.
Lost.
Black is waiting for you.
Disregarded.
Forgotten.
Abandoned.
Black is me.
Mistaken.
Shadowed.
Lied.
Black is you.
Here.
There.
Everywhere.
Black is everyone.
Day.
Night.
Anytime.
Black is forever.
Run.
Hide.
Cry.
Black is inevitable.
Black is lurching,
Waiting to strike.
Black is your worst nightmare,
Come to life.
Black is unstoppable.
Thirteen reasons why
Learn from Hannah Baker’s mistakes
I did
http://youtu.be/oZ0blaNa6Wg
Miggs: 1
Clarice: 0
My eyes are weary of you before me
I see the best take, the light of daybreak
It shines upon me most I don’t see
No reason ever was given
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=az1loyEX_VY
Too hard to recoil this moment’s glory
A failed reminder, a broken story
My vague emotions one day will vanish
No reason ever was given
In the shuffling madness
Of the locomotive breath
Runs the all-time loser
Headlong to his death
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bNCT6pA5I9A
He feels the piston scraping
Steam breaking on his brow
Old Charlie stole the handle and
The train it won’t stop going
No it don’t slow down
He hears the silence howling
Catches angels as they fall
And the all-time winner
Has got him by the balls..
Hi everyone..this is a poem I created about last year..when depression hit it’s worst..well here it goes,
Trapped like a bird I sit in this cage
Never once to show a bit of rage
Empty, like a book without it’s page
All I know is now..I bleed
The one that watches me has no creed
All the thoughts..on MY mind
Never are they..ever kind
My eyes become dark..I think I am blind
My mind wishes to just rewind
To forget everything I had once done
But, my heart challenged my mind…and won
So know..I still am forced to know what I have done
I am no […]