It’s coming up on the big day and for a little while I was actually able to forget about it…found meaning in painting again, in witnessing my younger siblings’ awesome potential and magical ability to just be happy. A beautiful couple weeks without any physical pain. Then everything rushed back in. Can’t paint, can’t write, can’t cook, can barely open doors. Nobody knows what it is and nothing has helped. Undiagnosable pain in my hands since I was 16. Â Nothing makes me feel as hopeless as this. Not knowing that I will never find love with a girl, never have babies or finish school, never […]
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