I am mute, i just cut, and i feel like dyeing, why? Because my mom finally broke me. All i have ever wanted is for my mother to love me and care like other moms do, but i never get her love, when she was down and sad wjo helped her? ME WHEN I WAS ONLY 5, I DIDNT EVEN KNOW WHY SHE WAS CRYING AT THAT AGE BUT I WAS THE ONE WHO HELD HER TILL SHE FELL ASLEEP, ME! I WAS THE ONE WHO CARED WHEN MY DAD WENT! AND KMOW SHE TREATS ME LIKE IM TRASH!!! WHAT DID I DO!!! IM ONLY […]
Tag:
Dyeing
I give up. I can’t be bothered waking up everyday to be mooching around my house with the same thoughts going through my head. Faking the smile for people, but inside dyeing. Not being able to attend school because I can’t cope. Not having any friends, just faking the smile for your family because you can’t bear hurting them anymore. Keeping everything to yourself because you trust no one. I just want to get out. I would say whats wrong on here but I can’t I need to get it off to someone.. but who?, I can;t take this no more.
I always seem to float in-between. Not one thing or another. And I’ve been dead for so long now that I’ve forgotten how to be alive. I’m a zombie. So I was wondering, could someone please tell me how to live? (This is not a sarcastic/metaphoric question.)
Hoping and planning
A jubilant day
Swimming in my fantasies
Senses dulled by illusion
Almost real
Talking and laughing
Near to you
Blood aching under my skin
So aware of you
Almost close enough
Cutting and scraping
My emotions away
Dyeing the world with rivers of red
Delusions clouding my judgments
Almost numb
Trying and grasping
The edge of the knife
Dangling […]